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CoasterChickie
07-21-2005, 03:05 AM
Let me start by saying that if you ever feel like you shouldn't take a kid to DL for whatever reason, don't.

As most of you know, renta and I are very good friends and we both have wonderful families. Unfortunately, my youngest daughter is 10 going on 13 and decided to be a really big brat while renta and her family were visiting us, especially toward renta's oldest daughter .

We really debated whether we should go to DL or not, but renta had already bought the park hoppers and plane tickets and we had already paid for the Hojos for 3 nights and DLH for 2 nights. And she couldn't go alone with her kids because she needed me to drive them down there , help with her kids, take them to the airport at the end of the trip, bring back the two car seats and stroller that me and my sister loaned her , plus I had promised Keith a ride home.

So then I thought about just leaving my daughter with her two older sisters at my friend's house (my hubby and son were on a backpacking trip at Yosemite the whole time we were gone). But that didn't seem right either since the DL trip was originally supposed to be Tiffany and me going with DisneylandForvever and his family and seeing whoever else was down there.


In retrospect, I should have left Tiffany home. She was fine around renta and her two younger kids and really enjoyed spending time at the Joe's Crab Shack Meet, going on rides with Disney1mom and her daughter, hanging out with Shortiemetoo in DCA, swimming with Lisap's daughters and going to dinner at the Storyteller's Cafe with them, and spending time with DisneylandForever and Mukta in DL. But she continued to behave terribly around renta's oldest daughter almost the entire time despite my using almost every parenting trick in the book. I was in tears in DL at least three different times, and at one point in the DLH, I was disciplining her in the hallway, but thought I was being too loud and maybe disturbing other guests , so I took her outside and then suddenly remembered that I was still in my pajamas! I was about ready to put her on an airplane and fly her home after that one!!


It made for a really really stressful trip for everyone. I'd like to apologize to anyone I met this past week who may have thought I was being unfriendly or boring instead of being my usual bubbly self. I was just trying to survive and doing my best to make sure that renta and her family's trip wasn't getting ruined. Luckily, there were lots of other padders there to help her when I couldn't.


And despite Tiffany's behavior, we still managed to have some good times together and a lot of laughs.

I'll post more about the positive details of our trip later. I mostly just shared this awful aspect of our trip to let anyone reading this know that if you're ever going to take a long, expensive trip to DL, make sure all of the kids really like each other a lot because DL is a lot of work even when the kids all get along really well.

Hakuna Makarla
07-21-2005, 04:59 AM
http://mousepad.mouseplanet.com/showpost.php?p=672483&postcount=503

that was my take on taking a child on a trip when missbehaving :)

I am so sorry you had a bad time Annie, I was thinking the whole time you were gone you were in for a ride ! I am glad you are home, and Yes, we now want to hear all about the fun things you did :) Did you get a "I was thee pin" ? hats, any thing special ? who did ya meet, what were they liike? ok, we want to see pictures ,and we want a full report. nothing less ok. :)

lisap
07-21-2005, 06:01 AM
:(
I know how hard it is when kids aren't getting along. It's happened to everyone! As a parent you feel just sick over it. One time a parent stopped me in the hallway of school and proceeded to chew me out about how my youngest was ganging up on her daughter and how she wasn't going to stand for it anymore, etc. etc.. I just stood there feeling sick to my stomach and was close to tears all day. The hard part was I could picture my daughter doing it and the realization almost knocked me over. We all want our kids to do the right thing all the time but they're human like the rest of us.

When it's at the park it's even more intensified. You know what--give it some time and the bad memories won't be the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of that trip. Concentrate on the good things that happened. :)

disneyhound
07-21-2005, 06:03 AM
Hang in there coasterchickie; consequences are looming for your daughter, and another one of life's lessons will be learned.

Would like to hear more of the upside...

Shortiemetoo
07-21-2005, 07:15 AM
Hi Coaster Chickie and Tiffany,
I must say that Tiffany was the BEST behaved child I saw in Disneyland or DCA my entire trip there!!! She was polite, sweet and very very eager to please!! I entirely enjoyed my time spent with both of you and I hope that I get another chance to meet you both in the future!!
I can't wait to get the pics in my camera off to you!! You two were so cute with your faces painted! I had some great times going on rides with you both and got to meet Disney1mom and her DD too!! That was icing on the cake!
Puberty is an awful time...and puberty at Disneyland is even harder!!! Especially when you are used to being in Santa Cruz where it had been cooler than Anaheim when you visitied!!
I say kudos to you for being a good and responsible parent and giving your daughter memories that she will have for the rest of her life! I am very happy I got to meet you both! I can't imagine that it was nearly as bad as you imagined it was. I think, perhaps that you just saw your little girl acting like a teenager for the first time!!!
I am happy you both got home safely!!

Crazy4DL
07-21-2005, 07:28 AM
Hi Coaster Chickie and Tiffany,
I must say that Tiffany was the BEST behaved child I saw in Disneyland or DCA my entire trip there!!! She was polite, sweet and very very eager to please!! I entirely enjoyed my time spent with both of you and I hope that I get another chance to meet you both in the future!!
I can't wait to get the pics in my camera off to you!! You two were so cute with your faces painted! I had some great times going on rides with you both and got to meet Disney1mom and her DD too!! That was icing on the cake!
Puberty is an awful time...and puberty at Disneyland is even harder!!! Especially when you are used to being in Santa Cruz where it had been cooler than Anaheim when you visitied!!
I say kudos to you for being a good and responsible parent and giving your daughter memories that she will have for the rest of her life! I am very happy I got to meet you both! I can't imagine that it was nearly as bad as you imagined it was. I think, perhaps that you just saw your little girl acting like a teenager for the first time!!!
I am happy you both got home safely!!

You know what Shortie? I just have to say I LIKE YOU!!!

I know this is CC thread but I just had to butt in here after reading your post and tell you that! :)


And CC, read Shortie's post several times - she is a wonderful mom and grammie to be and I am betting she is right on this one. All kids do that "act up at the worst possible moment" thing (which since Tiffany is the youngest of 4, I am sure you already know ;) ) It always seems worse to the parent than to the other people in my experience.

YES!!! we want the fun details - a day or two and they will stand out over the not so fun details. I think going outside in your pjs was rather funny :D ;) and you and Tiffany will laugh yourselves silly over that one in about 10 years. :)

ETA: if I had read Lisap post closer to start with I would have seen that she already mentioned the "give it time" thought - great minds Lisa :) ;)

JosieGirl71
07-21-2005, 07:53 AM
I just have to say that I love the advice from lisap, Shortiemetoo and Ruthie. Just think of it as the trials and tribulations of having adolescent children. Given time, I think you will be able to see the good times of this trip more than the bad. Hang in there, CC!

CoasterChickie
07-21-2005, 07:58 AM
YES!!! we want the fun details - a day or two and they will stand out over the not so fun details. I think going outside in your pjs was rather funny :D ;)


The other rather funny thing about that episode is that while we were going down on the elevator, it stopped at one floor and the doors opened to a lady who was waiting to get on , and I said "Trust me, you don't want to get on this elevator right now, my kid's in trouble." She nodded her head in agreement and said "I understand."

I just felt really helpless and frustrated and there was no way to get hold of my hubby who is my rock since he was in the mountains. But Shortiemetoo, Disney1mom, and Lisap all gave me some good tips that helped a little. And my daughter Brittany kept calling me every day to make sure I was okay. I think I have a long hard road ahead of me with this daughter. But enough about that...

To make this more of an official trip report, let me comment on the hotels. The Hojos was GREAT!!! I was really truly impressed with everything....the bedroom, the bathroom, the pool area, the view of DL and the fireworks, and the walking distance wasn't bad at all. Plus I really liked the MImis right across the street...cute atmosphere and great food for a great price plus the service was really good.

The DLH was also wonderful as always...we had a room on the 8th floor of the Sierra Tower with a view of the swimming pool thanks to Disney1mom (Thank you!! :) BTW Robert from the front desk said to tell you hi and give you a big hug but we never saw you again after we checked in...hope you had a great time on the rest of your trip and a good trip home)

Now here's the really funny part....Disneylandforever and I were both wiped by 7 pm on Tuesday night and there was no way either of us was going to be able to drive home so my daughter Courtney went onto Expedia to find us a room. The only thing she could find was the Alamo Inn and Suites for $74 . It was a dive, but I loved it because unlike the Days Inn and Suites, it knew it was a dive and didn't pretend to be something better and charge more money. And I had the best night's sleep there I 'd had in two weeks even though I know my daughter was snoring all night because the bed was hard as a rock. When I took a shower, the water kept changing temperature on me which cracked me up because I usually alternate hot and cold water anyways. And it was actually kind of nice being able to park my car right downstairs from where I was unloading and loading luggage versus the DLH where I had to walk a long ways every time I needed something from the car. I can't say I would highly recommend this hotel, but I certainly didn't mind staying there.

Shortiemetoo
07-21-2005, 08:07 AM
[QUOTE=Crazy4DL]You know what Shortie? I just have to say I LIKE YOU!!!

I know this is CC thread but I just had to butt in here after reading your post and tell you that! :)
QUOTE]

Ahh You are the sweetest ((((((Hugs to you))))), you brought tears to my eyes and warm fuzzies to my heart!! So when am I going to be lucky enough to meet you???!!!!!
Disney1mom rocks!!! She is the nicest lady and was such a sweetheart! She is one of those people who even if you meet them for only a few min. they make an impression that lasts a lifetime!! Thank you for my pin!!! Coaster Chickie, thank you for introducing her to me!!

Coaster, Tiffany is going to be a wonderful person, just like her Mom is!! She is the youngest and therefore will have the hardest time growing up!! But don't get too harried over it!!! She is already an awesome heart!!

stitchlvr
07-21-2005, 08:36 AM
CC, hang in there! The fact that your daughter is seen as so wonderful tells you that things will be ok. She will, in fact, become wonderful to you again in time too. This is a really hard stage as a parent and all kids are different. Perhaps your older ones went through this stage differently. Just try to hang in there and get support so you don't kill her. :p

CoasterChickie
07-21-2005, 09:11 AM
Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement.


I could undertand my daughter being mean if someone had been mean to her first , but renta's daughter and other two kids are totally adorable and renta really shines as a mom when she is with them.



I just thought of something really funny that happened on the trip yesterday. There was a young girl asleep on a bench in DL and the monkey from Tarzan (can't think of his name right now) saw her sleeping there and went over and tapped her until she woke up. The look on her face was sooo funny!! :D

I think the best moment of the trip was when I finally found the Buzz Lightyear straw I had been promised to get renta's son if I found one. It was at the Crocs and Bits at the DLH. I was so excited when I found it that I almost called her on her cell phone right from there. He was so excited when I gave it to him! He's a darn cute kid!

MrsPooh
07-21-2005, 09:49 AM
CC, don't let it get you down. Tiffany is a great kid, and I agree with everyone's advice. And, maybe it was hard for Tiffany to "share" mom on the trip. That happens sometimes. And let's not forget she is a girl, it is something we women do at times! ;)

She just needed Piglet there to put her into fits of laughter, like he does (and she does to him!) That would have fixed everything! ;)

Matt Hamand
07-21-2005, 10:07 AM
One DL trip we met up with one of my wife's co-workers. She (the co-worker) was taking her son and some friends to DL for her son's birthday. There was her some and 3 friends all about 12 years old.

One of the kids was totally unhappy. He was sullen, didn't participate with the group and was a drag on all of us. My wife watched him while the rest of us went on California Screamin' (she was pregnant). He barely acknowledged her, or the CM who tried to chat with him. The only thing that he seemed to react to was the frozen strawberry lemonade.

My wife's friend told us that when they went to lunch at Rainforest Cafe, he wouldn;t order anything saying he wasn't hungry. Then a couple hours later he was suddenly hungry and made Kathy buy him something while the rest of us went on a ride.

Sorry your daughter mad the trip a rough one. But you're not alone.

Crazy4DL
07-21-2005, 10:11 AM
I could undertand my daughter being mean if someone had been mean to her first , but renta's daughter and other two kids are totally adorable

!

I can remember being unhappy in my own skin at that age at times and taking it out on those around me even though they had done nothing! my poor mom!! Tiffany will out grow it I am betting - from all reports she is already a great little girl with a big heart :)

Shortiemetoo
07-21-2005, 10:23 AM
I can remember being unhappy in my own skin at that age at times and taking it out on those around me even though they had done nothing! my poor mom!! Tiffany will out grow it I am betting - from all reports she is already a great little girl with a big heart :)

I had to pop in and tell you how much I LOVE your avator Ruthie!!! Adorable!!!

And coaster I still feel unhappy in my own skin sometimes...lol ;)

Christiii
07-21-2005, 10:45 AM
Oh my gosh, Im so sorry!! that sucks to be in the happeist place on earth and have a rotten time...You need to plan another trip soon to get it out of your system! :D On another note, Im thrilled you liked the Hojo...cant I get a Told Ya so!! haha....isnt it the best?? and Mimis too!! Especially if you get a room with a microwave, its the best for Mimi's leftovers!!
Im heading to the Hojo's tommorow for five days....(got to sneak in the LA Gift Show too at some point)
Im glad at least, your hotel stay was ok!!
p.s. How was Space Mountain, that had to be a good thing too..right?? :D

CoasterChickie
07-21-2005, 11:14 AM
Sorry your daughter made the trip a rough one. But you're not alone.


Thanks Matt!


Wow! That kid sounds like he was really tough. At least my daughter had a lot of good moments too. I mostly just felt really bad for renta and her family because they were the ones besides me who had to deal with Tiffany at her worst moments.

But like I said we had a lot of really fun times and laughs too! Any time we were hanging out at the Hojo's or DLH swimming pools was pretty relaxing. And we had some comical times in the hotel room when the kids were singing cute songs and telling stories like they were at school or camp.


Another "official" trip report aspect....the food!! We went to a lot of places I hadn't been to before and I tried some new things at the places I had been to before. I liked Joe's crab Shack..the atmosphere was fun, the food was good but a little pricey for what it was, and the company was nice...Hi Darkbeer, lisa and everyone else! Mimi's has excellent breakfast food, really good clam chowder, and yummy chicken nuggets for the kids. I also tried the meatloaf at Ariel's per dsney1mom's suggestion and it was fabulous. At Storyyteller's Cafe I ordered the woodstove pizza and it was probably the best I've ever had. It was only $12 and I ate two pieces then was full so we all ate it for breakfast in the hotel room the next day. The nachos at the lost bar are yummy as are the chicken strips and fries. Rainforest Cafe was good...DLF and I both got Cobb salads and we could have easily split one. I also ordered a Green Python drink because it came in a lightening glass....very cool....that I wanted to take home to my son. I also had meatloaf at the Carnation Cafe. It was very good, but not quite as good as the Ariel's meatloaf. Tiffany had the pot pie and she loved it. I am proud to say that I only had one caramel apple , one chocolate covered banana and half a container of the noney popcorn the whole time. I better not have gained any weight!!

Matt Hamand
07-21-2005, 12:09 PM
Another "official" trip report aspect....the food!! We went to a lot of places I hadn't been to before and I tried some new things at the places I had been to before.
Last night as a surprise / spontaneous anniversary outing Michelle and I drove to DLR and ate dinner at the Blue Bayou. It was the first time there for both of us.

When we hit the check in at 6:15 they weren't accepting walk ins. So we went over to Redd Rocket's and said hi to my sister-in-law who started working there a couple of weeks ago. She was surprised to see us. Then we walked back toward NOS the long way, pausing to ride Big Thunder.

We got back to BB at around 7:00 and they took us then. We had a nice waterside table and a great meal. I had prime rib, Michelle had the pork loin. We shared a dessert. We were stuffed.

We left the restaurant at about 8:30, left the parking structure at 9:00 and were back in San Diego to pick up the baby from my mom's house by 10:00. We flew.

It was a long way to go, and a long time for a spur of the moment trip, but I scored some major good husband points.

disneyperson
07-21-2005, 12:10 PM
Sorry that your trip wasn't as magical as it could have been. We were hoping to hook up with you guys at the MP meet, but it wasn't meant to be this time. DLF told us you wouldn't be in the park that day.
I remember a trip when my son was 14 and my daughter was 4. We went with my sister and her 14 year old son thinking they'd be great company for each other while we took little ZB around. Wrong! They ended up fighting and nit picking at each other the whole time.(the car ride was tons-o-fun)Couldn't agree on anything! It was not a horrible trip, but it was my least favorite one.
Sometimes kids surprise you in a wonderful way, and sometimes it goes in the opposite direction. There's just so much going on in their heads, especially at your daughter's age.
Glad you were able to make some magic out of your trip. And I tend to think like some of the other posters here that she wasn't really as bad as you say. It just feels so much worse when it's your own kid.

pisces
07-21-2005, 03:08 PM
I'm wondering if you could sit down and talk with your daughter about what it means to have a good attitude, and demeanor. Kids can be selfish, and they might not understand the concept of morale and how the attitude of one, can bring down the whole group......then again, maybe that was her intent.

Sometimes kids are so self-centered that they feel if they're bothered, then the whole world needs to be bothered too.

How do kids get to be so self-centered? Ahem.

If it were me: I would sit down and discuss getting-along skills, try to come to a consensus about what an appropriate attitude and demeanor is.

I think you and she should try to BOTH come to an agreement about what you BOTH think is appropriate attitude and behavior.

....And then have her sign a contract agreeing that that's how she will conduct herself.......and what the consequences will be if she doesn't live up to her end of the bargain.

It really teaches kids about agreements, and living up to your end of things.

And, she knows exactly whats expected of her.

Maybe you can be flexible when the standards aren't met, but at least you've defined what the standards are, and have definite expectations, before you go on the next trip.

IMHO IMHO IMHO

Earkid
07-21-2005, 03:57 PM
CC, I am glad you posted about your troubles with your daughter. So sorry the trip had some down spots. I think all kids will act like that at one time or another no matter what you do or how you try to reason with them.

Your story helped me make a decision about a future trip. I have two nieces (Morgan lives close to me) and Katie (who's dad is my other brother and they live in another state). We have been feeling guilty for not arranging to take Katie on our last trip to DL with Morgan. Katie is 2 years older than Morgan and sometimes they get along famously and other times they pick at each other till everyone is in a state of hysteria. I don't think I am going to chance a trip taking just the two of them. I'll wait until her parents can come too, for back up. We were thinking that being in Disneyland would keep them in a good mood and assure that they would get along the entire time but I guess even the magic of DL has its limitations. :)

Thanks again for sharing your frustrating, but fun trip.

AnnaBanana
07-21-2005, 04:34 PM
Welcome back CC! Glad you made it home safely! I'm sure that your good, fun, happy moments will outweigh the bad ones. I also hope you find out what was troubling Tiffany! She's a sweet kid, and it doesn't sound like she acts out like this very often.

CoasterChickie
07-21-2005, 04:41 PM
If it were me: I would sit down and discuss getting-along skills, try to come to a consensus about what an appropriate attitude and demeanor is.

I think you and she should try to BOTH come to an agreement about what you BOTH think is appropriate attitude and behavior.




IMHO IMHO IMHO


Thanks for the good advice. There were times when it was understandable why she was angry or upset , but she just wasn't handling those emotions very well . I think we as adults even feel the same way sometimes , but are better at holding our tongues (unless we're pushed too far).

When I was finally able to get hold of my hubby on the cell phone, he talked to her and gave her some really good tips about what to do and she did exactly what he told her to do and it worked. My hubby is a very wise man! :)

Thanks again for your good advice too.

Earkid....I think you made a wise decision too about your nieces ..the more back up, the better...and having both males and females there is a good idea!! I kept joking with the guys on this trip that they were like the male elephants in Africa who are brought in to calm down the female and young 'uns in the herds!! :D

BTW...DLF, and Marox's husband and son were our male elephants and all three of them were awesome!! :fez:

Crazy4DL
07-21-2005, 04:51 PM
I don't think I am going to chance a trip taking just the two of them. I'll wait until her parents can come too, for back up. We were thinking that being in Disneyland would keep them in a good mood and assure that they would get along the entire time but I guess even the magic of DL has its limitations. :)

.

Probably a smart more, Earkid. :)

That is exactly what you would think - we are in DL, everyone will be so nice and happy and kind to each other - and it just doesn't work that way with kids (not even adults sometimes :( ).

Sometimes they are so good you are surprised and sometimes they are so cranky and ornery you want to just cry yourself! All the more frustrating to the parents since they have spent tons of money and time and want their kids to have the time of their lives and instead their normally well behaved kids are having break downs and being terrible.

I am thinking I will have some stories to make you feel much better CC, when I get back from 8 days with 7 little ones and 7 big "kids" and my DH!! :eek: ;)

SCUBAbe
07-21-2005, 04:52 PM
it must ahve been the weekend for bad kids...my child thre a fit right outside the bathrroms near space moutain. She turned to walk away from me (yeah....I don't like that) and ealked right inot a motorized wheelchair thing. It ran over her foot and stopped abrubtly. I felt really bad until i saw a CM was driving it to another area. She stood right up and glared at my child...i mean really GLARED. My daughter had a shocked face on her look when it first happened, btut he galring pissed her off more so she starts galring back. I aplogized tot eh Cm and she galred at me and drove away.....(I thought the CM's attitude was pretty harsh. it was an accident.) however, i was still pissed at my child for doing that. It could ahve been a handicapped person! I tried talking to her about that and she ran off in the corwds of the 17th. It took me like 15 minutes to find her. I pulled her butt into the arcade and we had it out. She was better after that....oh, and guess what she was originally mad at. She said look space mountain. I said yep and the wait is only 45 min. that was it. she didn't want to wait to ride it and assumed I did.....when do the teenage years end....LOL