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Pirate Girl
04-02-2003, 07:06 PM
Ok, am I totally out of line here or is this rediculous? While at DL last week I was innocently wandering through Adventurland at about 3 min till closing hoping to slip onto Indy before they cut off the line. As I hurry through the mass of bodies heading toward the exit I spied a mom tugging at her little girl and yelling at her to hurry up. (Now, this kid was little, the age that should be in a stroller or carried--especially in crowds.) The poor kid was having trouble keeping up with her frantic mom, but for good reason...her pants had fallen down and she was trying to run with them around her ankles. As I was about to say something, another good sameritan let the mom know. She then yelled at the kid for not keeping her pants buttoned. Ummm. The girl was barely old enough to walk.

SteveK
04-02-2003, 09:27 PM
Unfortunately there are just some really bad parents out there. I've seen things that make me cringe, make me sad and make me want the beat the life out of some parents. Being a parent is one of the most difficult, frustrating and incredibly rewarding experiences you could ever have. I think too many people take on child rearing as a chore vs. a responsibility...the most important responsibilty they'll ever have. I work and my wife stays at home and raises our two Disneyholic daughters. I often tell her that even though I keep a roof over our heads, I value what she does a thousand times more that what I do...she's the primary shaper of what our kids will become on day. Talk about alot of responsibilty. But that's the way you need to look at things as a parent. Too many don't and that's why we have so many messed up kids in the world. The sad thing is, that child will probably become a product of his/her environment and the vicious circle will start and continue as he/she has his/her own children one day.

-Steve

scaeagles
04-03-2003, 06:09 AM
It is absolutely aweful the treatment that some children receive at DL by their parents. It makes me wonder what it's like for them when they arent' in public. Sometimes the happiest place on earth just isn't, you know?

I only hope that perhaps it is magnified by being tired - both parent and child.

Maybe I'm unrealistic, but I am amazed at the language some of these parents spout out at their children. I have yelled at my kids before, but I have never sworn at them. And it's not just d@mn, either. Things like "You little f($%er!". Simply inexcusable.

justagrrl
04-03-2003, 06:58 AM
I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt. It's closing time. They've been there all day. Everyone is cranky. Just keep walking and get over it.

scaeagles
04-03-2003, 09:11 AM
Just keep walking and get over it.

I can see why you describe yourself as "meanest mother ever"!

I don't say anything to them. I am just amazed and saddened by it.

Toady The Eighth
04-03-2003, 09:20 AM
I don't say anything either, but I am often tempted to. And even though it isn't my child, and obviously, is none of my business, I have a hard time just "getting over it" sometimes. I have seen children start to look "lost" in the park before, and as soon as I see the "Where's my mommy?" look, I immediately try and help..

Guess I'm just nosy that way.. What can I say? I like kids.

pokeypoke
04-03-2003, 12:40 PM
After working several years at both DL and WDW, I have to say that I have seen a WIDE spectrum of parenting skills displayed within the realms of the parks. Although I have witnessed more WONDERFUL parent/child interaction at DL, there are still a few dozen or so NOT SO WONDERFUL moments that still linger within my mind.

I'll never forget while working at DL back in 1986 which involved an overpowering grandmother, her daughter and her daughter's daughter who was about 4 or 5 years old. To begin with, the grandmother who was about 50 or so, looked absolutelt gastly! She wore a tub top and an open black lrather jacket wich exposed her belly rolls. On top of that, she worse tight red shorts that rode up her behind and wore makeup that seemed as if it were re-applied day after day, without ever once being washed off. What was really sad was that the grand-daughter was dress almost identical and even had makeup on. They were over at NOS while some music was playing and the grandmother dragged the grand daughter out in front of a crowd of people, started clapping her hands and told the little girl to start dancing. The child did not want to dance and the grandmother yanked her by the hair really hard and started yelling at her in Spanish. The daughter in the meantime told the grandmother that she was going somewhere and the little girl wanted to go. The mother said "No, you stay here with Nana". The mother took off and couldn't have given a rat's tail about her daughter. The grandmother continued to make the grand daughter dance while the child had tears in her eyes. Poeple were just appauled! The grandmother stood there as though nothing was wrong, clapping her hands while saying "Dance Fantasy, Dance"! (the child's name was Fantasy). Finally, a suppervisor who saw what was going on, went over and started talking to the child's grandmother. I'm not really sure what was said but the little girl didn't have to dance anymore. Words can not really do justice for how sad and horrible that scene was.

pokey:(

Toady The Eighth
04-03-2003, 01:02 PM
My God, that sounds awful.

Sometimes I wonder why people who are going to get so stressed out and tired that they feel inclined to scream and get physical at their kids in the middle of a crowded place even bother to take their kids to Disneyland in the first place.

justagrrl
04-03-2003, 01:05 PM
Originally posted by scaeagles
I can see why you describe yourself as "meanest mother ever"!

:rolleyes: :eek:

KateyMcButterpants
04-21-2003, 10:44 PM
We were at DL this past weekend and we were appaled at some of the parenting we saw. When we go, it's for our daughter, who is nearly a year old. The day is all about her. We don't bring a stroller, we carry her so that she gets constant stimulation and interaction. Some parents use the strollers as battering rams to get through the crowds. I see so many bottles propped, and even saw one baby in a stroller with one of those hands-free feeding devices. :eek:

It makes me cringe when I see parents yelling at their kids inside the park. That should make for a treasued memory! The worst was when my husband saw a mother slap her six year old so hard he fell off his chair. She's lucky I didn't see her.

PhilMP
04-22-2003, 01:26 AM
I'm always disturbed by the number of parents who are forced to put their toddlers on leashes. I mean...I know that young children do have a tendency to explore and wander away and whatnot, and the child abduction craze just ended, but do we really have to resort to treating children like domesticated animals?

But what angers me the most is when the parent yanks his/her end of the leash to get the child to come back to them. It's as if their parenting skills are so abysmal that a simple "Come here <name>" won't suffice, but they have to possibly harm the child in order to get his/her attention.

Phil

10krbell
04-22-2003, 07:29 AM
First of all I agree with stupid parents. They are there and they seem to proliferate inside the Parks!

And on the other hand, you have the parents who let their kids get away with anything and everything! Ok, I am not the meanest Mom in the world (at least I hope not) but my daughter is very aware that Disneyland has corners and she has visited a few of them on the days when we have taken people to the park that don't have APs. Granted when its just family and she acts up, we pack it up and leave!

But on our most recent trip, I watched kids snatch things out of strangers' hands in the Emporium simply because they wanted it and the parents just laughed it off! I watched a child, (who looked about 3) running around, almost run over by an ODV cart, and the parents had tha audacity to yell at the CM! I never worked ODV, but I know that its nearly impossible to see over the larger ones...and the were the parents watching the kid??? No!!!

Ok...I'm jumping off the soapbox, just more instances of "Check Your Brain at the Gate"

dsnylndmom
04-22-2003, 07:34 AM
Like your quote says "don't judge a person...." I have used a wrist leash with my son at Disneyland when he was 2 & 3 because he was a runner. No matter how many times I explained to him not to run away, telling him the consequences etc he would still run. On top of that he suffers from speech delays so at those ages he was barely able to tell anyone his name much less my or my husband's names. Yet he needed time out of the stroller to stretch his legs, the leash was a safety issue for us. The last two times we have went, he was 4 and 4.5 he understands not to run away(most of the time)and he is able to say his name, my name and the names of everyone in our party clearly now(great strides!)so he was able to walk with us alot and not use a leash.

Now granted, I never pulled on Shawn's leash like he was a dog to stop him or get his attention and I agree that is not right. But I wanted to post that there are reasons why people use the leash.

Tina

scaeagles
04-22-2003, 08:04 AM
Dsnylndmom and 10krbell have it right. There is appropriate and inappropriate behavior for children, but different needs and personalities. Each child has forms of communication and discipline they respond to best, and anyone who thinks they have all the answers usually doesn't have kids!

Beyond physical abuse (which I do not think a controlled spanking is) and degrading your child, you gotta do what works. I have a 9 year old that I just have to look at crossways and she starts bawling. I have a 3 year old that when on his agenda simply does not listen unless I raise my voice. Each kid is different, so I'm not going to look at someone who tugs on their kids leash like a dog and assume they are a bad parent - I don't know the situation. As long as they don't cross that difficult to define line, it's no biggie. I don't know their kid or what that kid responds to or what that kid has the potential to do.

karpamonti
04-22-2003, 09:28 AM
My husband and I are taking our daughter to Disneyland in November for her first birthday. I, like many parents, have been to Disney enough times for myself to know this trip is for her. We are going for 4 days so we have plenty of time to go at her pace. I don't understand why parents go comando with a little one in toe. I will rent a stroller, but I don't plan on being aggresive with it. And I also plan on getting to a parade or show in time to stake out a seat and not expect to push my child infront of someone as the show/parade starts. I have waited my whole life to experience Disneyland through my childs eyes. I want this to be a memorable trip for oour whole family...especially Chloe. :D

ChipmunkStar
04-22-2003, 09:53 AM
Phil, trust me, some parents actually need to look into investng in those leashes. After telling children several times over within five minutes that it isn't their turn to vist the character yet, I'll stop everything, look around and say "Whose kids are these? Yeah, could you hold onto him/her/them until it's their turn to visit?" I will totally stop a characterin their tracks because know if the kid happens to run in front of Goofy when he's bending to hug another kid. . . BAM! Hi, meet Goofy's hat. It's solid, as is the child's head.

Anyways, I have, on several occasions made a comment: "Whoa! Someone get a leash on that kid!" Some parents don't even notice until somebody's said something that their dear little Billy is driving everybody else NUTS!!!!

scaeagles
04-22-2003, 09:56 AM
Originally posted by karpamonti
My husband and I are taking our daughter to Disneyland in November for her first birthday. I, like many parents, have been to Disney enough times for myself to know this trip is for her. We are going for 4 days so we have plenty of time to go at her pace. I don't understand why parents go comando with a little one in toe. I will rent a stroller, but I don't plan on being aggresive with it. And I also plan on getting to a parade or show in time to stake out a seat and not expect to push my child infront of someone as the show/parade starts. I have waited my whole life to experience Disneyland through my childs eyes. I want this to be a memorable trip for oour whole family...especially Chloe. :D

I salute you, karpamonti. As far as DL is concerned, there is NOTHING better than taking your kid to DL for the first time. I actually went there quite a bit during my HS days in the early 80s, but got so bored with it I didn't go again until 1995 when my first was almost 3. You will have a blast.

On behalf of considerate parents everywhere, I thank you for NOT pushing your kid in front of everyone else who waited so their kid could see.

And you, Chipmunk, I couldn't agree with you more.

hefferdude
04-22-2003, 11:17 AM
Phil, trust me, some parents actually need to look into investng in those leashes.

Agreed!

One can call it a "child tether" a "leash" or a "harness" etc
but they do work for very small children in large busy places
and are hardly demeaning. A stroller gets bothersome. Think
how much easier Fantasyland would be without strollers.
It might even loose its moniker " S.H. "

One of our sons had a tendency to run and trip which ended up
in him taking headers into the pavement. Ouch!:eek:
The harness had a clip in the middle of the back. A toddler could then be drawn up at the first hint of an impending fall.
Also, he preferred walking which increased his being "bumped"
other guests. Sort of a Pinnochio thing ;) but it worked for us.

And it just looks like a pair of pant suspenders anyway...

Morrigoon
04-22-2003, 12:05 PM
Not to totally hijack this thread into another debate over child harnesses, but I want to put in my vote of approval for them. I spent my childhood with one arm over my head because that's what it took to hold my mom's hand. Have you ever held your hand over your head for a significant length of time? It's painful. I'd rather my future kids have the freedom that 3 feet of "leash" length allows and the use of both hands to explore than to go through what I went through.

That said (and getting back to stupid parents), I do not approve of leash yanking as a disciplinary measure. (There I got it back on topic, whoopee!)

Polar33
04-22-2003, 12:15 PM
The only thing I dislike about the child leashes is the parents that use them that allow their children to walk as far away from them as the leash will allow when walking down a crowded path. Not only does it cause more traffic flow issues, it is a major safety hazard.

I also dissapprove of large groups who insist on holding eachothers hands to negotiate their way through the crouds. It's not usually families with children that do that suprisingly, it's groups of adults. Again, it just causes more problems for everyone else that is trying to get around.

mad4mky
04-22-2003, 12:20 PM
From a parent who has never used a leash...(but am not against them, at all)...

I would rather see a parent use a leash, than go through what I did one time at DL...and lose a child.
Nothing can explain the horror I felt of having my dear girl disappear.
We had just got into the park, and as I was standing in line waiting to rent a stroller, with my 5 week old baby in the baby pack...I thought "Dad" was watching...he thought I was watching. Soon we both discovered, our precious little 4 year old girl (with Down syndrome) had disappeared!!!

Luckily, with the help of the wonderful castmembers, Disney Security and a family friend....she was found safe and sound.

But, parents don't put the leashes on to be mean to their children. They love them, and want them safe. Children, at a certain age don't like being stuck in a stroller...and they need to get out and run off some energy, and use their legs. Using a leash gives the child the chance to move, and the parent some security, and knowing, their child won't wander off, if their eyes get diverted by helping baby sister, or big brother with the ice cream he just got.

So, those of you, without little ones, please don't cast any stones against a glass house, that you one day, just might be living in.

I hope no one goes through the terror that I did a few years ago.
While I still didn't rush out to buy a leash after this, I could see why parents use them...

Gandalf
04-23-2003, 09:30 AM
We met a woman with an unusual way of coping with her son acting up. Our group was taking a break at the tables on the edge of Fantasyland and struck up a conversation with her. Her son kept tugging on his leash and yelling. After about 3 minutes of him doing this, she says alright and starts to breastfeed him. We were astonished that she did it because she had just told us he was 3 1/2 years old! After a few minutes he got down and was fine. She said it was the only thing that calmed him down in a crowd. Her husband and 2 other children came back then and he didn't seem happy she had been breastfeeding him. How old is too old to breastfeed? My wife only did our three until they were a year old.

KateyMcButterpants
04-23-2003, 10:06 AM
Gandalf, the AAP and the WHO recommend breastfeeding for at least one year and then for as long as mutually desired by baby and mother.

Morrigoon
04-23-2003, 10:48 AM
Well, I'd say anything over 1.5 years grosses me out, but I don't actually find it morally borderline until the kid's 2. I knew one woman who would still allow her daughter to breastfeed when she was 5! :eek:

The way I see it, if the child's old enough to ask for the breast by name, then they're too old to be drinking from it.

scaeagles
04-23-2003, 10:54 AM
I agree with all of you that think it's a bit weird, but should we be passing a moral judgement here? That seems to be taboo on the boards.