View Full Version : SimpTwister's Brilliant New Rivers of America Scheme

10-22-2002, 01:22 AM
Ok, Ok, I'm sure the good folks at the DLR have their own silly plans for RoA's future... But here's what they *should* do! ;)

There's been talk of building a new attraction on the Island. But new attraction or no, it could be generally stated that the Rafts are not the best way to get folks to and from TSI.

I have heard rumors of a tunnel to TSI from the mainland. But I have that beat. OK, here it is:

They build a pedestrian bridge to the Island, somewhere near the Big Thunder Trail.

'But Simp', you're saying, 'What about the Mark Twain and the Columbia?'

Answer: They re-route the big boats to follow a path not unlike that of the Streetcars on Main Street, only bent into a 'C' shape.

e.g., The Mark Twain leaves its dock as usual, cruises by NOS and Critter Country, rounds the northernmost bend in the river, turns south... then does a 180 (perhaps around a small island) just before it gets to the new Pedestrian Bridge.

It then retraces its path past Critter Country, past NOS, and past the dock, where it does another 180 (again, it should go around something, just to keep it interesting) near the Pedestrian Bridge just before docking.

So there you have it. Easy, uninterrupted pedestrian access to TSI, and uninterrupted Mark Twain and Columbia service.

10-22-2002, 08:42 AM
That's a good idea or like a drawbridge that could go up when the boats pass

10-22-2002, 04:50 PM
Sorry but no way. I like the ROA just as it is. I dont want the Columbia or the Mark Twain changed in any way.

10-22-2002, 07:27 PM
I think they should add pirates somewhere... you can never have enough pirates.

10-22-2002, 07:46 PM
Originally posted by Squinky
I think they should add pirates somewhere... you can never have enough pirates.

Some how that turns out to be a disturbing, yet humorous comment :confused:

--Preston/ Laffite

10-22-2002, 08:29 PM
Originally posted by Squinky
I think they should add pirates somewhere... you can never have enough pirates.

How about adding a software/music piracy attraction in DCA!

"DCA is proud to announce that in the spirit of California we will be converting SuperStar Limo into Pirates of the Internet Age!" Then you can hear Eisner yell "Your a Pirate!" I think this might be the answer to your request Squinky!

10-22-2002, 08:31 PM
no, silly rabbits, not internet or software pirates.... BLOODTHIRSTY PIRATES that say "aargh" and "wench" and so on.

10-22-2002, 08:59 PM
I like the software pirates idea better. A perfect attraction for DCA! :D

10-22-2002, 09:50 PM
Yep. They can give away the HMH soundtracks there.


Karlos the Jackal
10-23-2002, 05:16 AM
Squinky, don't be silly -- pirates don't say "aargh" or "wench," they say, "mmm, food is yummy."

I do agree that you can't ever have too many pirates.

My only problem with the Mark Twain plan is it wouldn't feel like you're actually going anywhere if you turn around and go back the way you came. Not that you really ever actually get anywhere going around in a circle or anything, you know, but still.


10-23-2002, 06:18 AM
Software pirates do say "argh" and "wench". You just don't know the right ones. ;)

10-23-2002, 12:14 PM
Why doesn't Disney do what they are really doing on the Mississippi, turn the Mark Twain into a floating Casino! Now that would really drive the bottom line ;)

10-23-2002, 02:06 PM
Actually, a restauraunt on a boat like Mark Twain would be pretty cool, like a cruise around the river dinner.

10-23-2002, 08:35 PM
Why not give us Disneysea's Mysterious Island out there. We could have Journey to the Center of the Earth and 20,000 leagues under the sea inside a volcano, making Disneyland's 5th mountain.

That would be two great new rides, and a new land to boot. As for getting people to the island, maybe a tunnel under the Rivers that comes up inside the volcano. That way we could still have the Mark Twain and it's circular trip around the island.

10-24-2002, 12:54 PM
Any other ideas for the island? There has got to be some other thoughts out there.

The Mark Twain as a restaurant is somewhat interesting.

10-24-2002, 05:58 PM
Mark Twain should be peaceful... if there was a huge volcano in the middle of the island I doubt it would.

But, like I said before, if it was a PIRATE volcano then it would be allowed.

10-24-2002, 06:11 PM
A pirate volcano it is then.

10-25-2002, 10:01 PM
I LOVE the ROA how it is now thank you very much.

Jon Vincible
10-25-2002, 11:06 PM
My goodness, so many interesting ideas to ponder. I think, however, that they should make the island into it's own land. I think that this new land should be called "Shop Land". I think Eisner would like this idea. They could have all sorts of shops in Shop Land. They could have a Disney shop, a GAP (ehehe), and maybe even a food court with McDonalds and Taco Bells and stuff. You could get to this "Shop Land" Thru a clumsily (but cost-efficient) wooden bridge constructed out of the pieces of the Mark Twain... since it wouldn't operate anymore. Shop Land might even have a kids area, where the kids just tell the cashiers their parents names and then things get charged to said parent's accounts. To save money on buildings they could just convert fort wilderness into shops, with some cubicle spacers to separate the shops. With slick sales people i think Shop Land could be a huge success, that, and the ideals of current Disney management.

10-26-2002, 12:17 AM
I think there should be a cave, and inside the cave, a fiendish attack rabbit. No, not just a silly rabbit, but a horrible monster with nasty pointy teeth!

(first male to crack a joke about adding Castle Anthrax gets bopped!)

How about ditching the western theme which is not very popular anymore and instead going with an early-american settler theme. It wouldn't be too far a stretch from Fort Wilderness, just a leap back in time. Do the whole Virginia thing with CMs in tricorn hats talking about the early days of America. One of the things which really stands out in my memory of my first visit to D.C. (at the ripe age of 4) was Williamsburg, and getting to bake bread and dip candles. (Baking it yourself is MUCH more fun than seeing a machine do it)

10-26-2002, 08:38 AM
Jon Vincible -

I can hear the background music already........"....they paved paradise and put up a parking lot....."

10-26-2002, 08:44 AM
But this also brings up a point about Frontier land in general -

While BTMR is an "ok" coaster, I liked the old train ride better - Why? Because it really gave Frontierland a more "rustic" feel - the attractions were "journies" into the backcountry and the "public areas" (the mercantile, the shooting gallery, the GH, and the MT loading dock) were the embarking points for those journies.

We spend a lot of time on this board taking about how to "redo" TM (the first priority) but what about this area?

10-26-2002, 09:37 AM
I really don't see a reason to "redo" Frontierland or the Rivers of America. You might want to use the old Thunder Ranch area to build MORE Frontierland attractions or a full-on food court with something more than pizza, burgers, and soda. Why not have a full-on BBQ restaurant along with assorted western food, some "rural" exhibits (I am not a huge exhibit fan but it couldn't be worse than Innoventions), and maybe throw in a new fortress on the mainland?

The one drawback to this would be when Fantasmic! returns as people getting prepared to come on stage for the show would already be highly visible unless some "barrier" was up.

Just a (very) rough idea, but why not? I am sure they can sell some t-shirts from "Johnny Appleseed's Cafe" and the "Miner's Exhibit" in the new areas. :)