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  1. #1
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    Trip without the kids?

    I've almost convinced my hubby to take a quick trip to DL for our 9th anniversary in June. DL is where we went for our honeymoon. Is it just wrong to go without our kids? I have mixed feelings about it.
    ETA: we are planning to take them for Halloween in 2015.

    Last edited by 5Mouseketeers; 10-02-2013 at 04:43 PM. Reason: Adding info

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  3. #2
    At home in the hills candles71's Avatar
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    Nope not wrong. DO.IT!!! We have gone 3 or 4 times without the kids. It is a whole different trip. Our last one was for our 20th, in December 2011. Our best friends' children ended up sending them with us for their anniversary as well. They had never been without their kids but had a great time as well.


  4. #3
    Obsessed Disney Mama 3Princesses1Prince's Avatar
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    We went in January without kids. So much fun hanging out at Cove Bar enjoying a drink, and actually riding rides together.


  5. #4
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    Go!!! It will be awesome!


  6. #5
    Registered User bumblebeeonarose's Avatar
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    We did this twice the year we had APs (DD was only one though, so she didn't understand where we were). It was nice to getaway and have a break for a night or two, and it was nice to be able to ride rides together as 3P1P says. We are deffinitely visiting the parks with my parents (and their other 2 grandkids) the week of June 23. I'm planning on getting APs again and I'm hoping that DH and I will be able to find time for at least one adult only trip. It may be more difficult since we have 2 kids to leave behind, and DD will KNOW where we're going without her.


  7. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by 5Mouseketeers View Post
    I've almost convinced my hubby to take a quick trip to DL for our 9th anniversary in June. DL is where we went for our honeymoon. Is it just wrong to go without our kids? I have mixed feelings about it.
    ETA: we are planning to take them for Halloween in 2015.
    Ask yourself this question:

    Is it wrong to go on a quick trip, without my kids, for my 9th anniversary? Of COURSE it's not wrong to go on an anniversary trip. (Assuming you can afford a quick trip and all that stuff.)

    Now just take it one step further:

    Is it wrong to go on a quick trip to Disneyland, without my kids, for my 9th anniversary?

    Does the answer change?

    Of course not.
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  8. #7
    At home in the hills candles71's Avatar
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    BBR, she is still young enough you can just say Mommy and Daddy are going bye bye without the where. My kids on the other hand were a bit older and figured it out. They just know if we go without them, we will go with them soon.


  9. #8
    Obsessed Disney Mama 3Princesses1Prince's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by candles71 View Post
    BBR, she is still young enough you can just say Mommy and Daddy are going bye bye without the where. My kids on the other hand were a bit older and figured it out. They just know if we go without them, we will go with them soon.
    True my big girls figured it out. My littles found out when we got back.

  10. #9
    Registered User familymemories's Avatar
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    No it is not bad to go without the kids. We just took a 3 day trip June 2013 for our 25th wedding anniversary. It was FUN!!! We never go anywhere without our kids. So, on that point, it was a great trip.

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  11. #10

    My husband doesn't really like to go to Disneylanad, but I have gone on several "girl" trips, and they are the greatest. I started this 30 yrs ago when my youngest was 3 and I was 34. My latest one was when he was 32 and I was 63. I'm planning another trip with just my kids who will be 33, 40 and 44. It will be for my 65th birthday. None of my kids have a problem going without their kids. Of course I want a trip to DL with all my kids and grandkids too. I'm planning on my husband going on that one, but I haven't told him yet. So, go without the kids. You will have a great time, and then you'll want to take the kids again.


  12. #11
    Out of this world for Disney DwarfPlanet's Avatar
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    Sheesh whatever I write seems to come out wrong so here it is, you started out as a couple and sometimes to keep the magic going you just need to be a couple once in awhile regardless of where your at or whatever age your kids are.

    "Although we think it's DOPEY that Pluto has been downgraded to a dwarf planet, which has made some people GRUMPY and others just SLEEPY, we are not BASHFUL in saying we would be HAPPY if Disney's Pluto would join us as an 8th dwarf. We think this is just what the DOC ordered and is nothing to SNEEZE at."

  13. #12
    Macabre Debutante leota's necklace's Avatar
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    Precisely. It's the Disney version of putting your own oxygen mask on first.


  14. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by DwarfPlanet View Post
    Sheesh whatever I write seems to come out wrong so here it is, you started out as a couple and sometimes to keep the magic going you just need to be a couple once in awhile regardless of where your at or whatever age your kids are.
    Well said DwarfPlanet. I was going to say the same thing but didn't want it to come across heavy handed. IMHO it's terribly important for kids to see that Mom and Dad are a couple/partners that do things for each other. If really helps the kids to see how an adult relationship works. How Mom and Dad were meant for each other and shared their love to have these wonderful kids. Yep, going to Disneyland for your anniversary is a wonderful idea. I hope you have a magical time!

    GnP

  15. #14
    Registered User DisneyGator's Avatar
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    I definitely miss the times that my wife and I went to Disney without the kids. Something magical about it, not to mention not having to keep tabs all day, haul their stuff all day, and the added expense. That said, I can't imagine going to Disney and NOT taking the kids. The only way I'd do it is if I just recently took them or I'm taking them in the very near future. I've often said, I didn't have kids to leave them at my folks whenever I feel like it. But that's just me.

    Working for Disney. No, no. Working (in a Modesto office) for (the money to take a trip to) Disney (World/Land)

    WDW Trips: June 2002, Feb 2004, Dec 2006, Dec 2008, Jan 2010, Feb 2011, Dec 2012
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  16. #15
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    Thank you all. It's given me something to think about. My hesitation is that I've only agreed to go on 1 overnight trip away from my kids (not counting being in labor & delivery at the hospital) and that was 2 years ago. We now have 3 children 6yo, 3yo and a 9 week old. I see where DisneyGator is coming from, but I don't leave my kids with my parents often. If we do it's maybe 3 hours. I also get what others have said about it being important to have time as a couple. Definitely not something we've made a priority in the last 6 years.


  17. #16
    At home in the hills candles71's Avatar
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    We haven't done it often, but it really is important for the relationship between just the two of you. We are fortunate to have baby stters we trust. The first time we ever went anywhere without the kids was when the oldest was 10 and the youngest was 1. We had been married for 11 years by then. That was a free weekend we had gotten from listening to a time share speil. Now that our kids are older (21, 19, 14, 11) it has become both easier and more nessasary as they are starting to move out and we need to still have something between us that isn't the kids.
    I won a 7 day Caribbean cruise that we went on in March. Ask the ladies here, I started freaking out as it got closer because we would be so far away. When we go to DL on our own, we fly (cheaper or about the same as driving), but could totally rent a car and drive home quickly if needed. Being that far away was difficult but the ladies here were great cheerleaders and we had an amazingly, relaxing, special time that was really just the 2 of us, since DH had to unplug froom work or pay international cell phone rates.
    So, wait a few months (9 weeks is so little) and try an overnight or weekend away nearby to test the waters and it would probably make you more comfortable.


  18. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by 5Mouseketeers View Post
    Definitely not something we've made a priority in the last 6 years.
    BTDT. Do you know what was one of the best moments of our entire marriage? I give you permission to laugh:

    One year, we went to Anaheim to WORK at MouseAdventure. Work. It was a one-night trip. We ended up finishing our work and didn't have a lot to do. Doc was blacked out on his AP. So we went back to our hotel and sat in bed. Watching a Deadliest Catch marathon. For a while we joked that Deadliest Catch saved our marriage. We hadn't just sat down and done something together in so long that it took watching TV in a hotel room to give us some us time. And do you know what we talked about?

    Deadliest Catch.

    It really wasn't that complicated. But we realized that we hadn't made any Us time for so long.

    The best gift you can give your kids is a good marriage. I'm not saying go to the opposite extreme. But this will be a good thing. I know it.
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  19. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by adriennek View Post
    The best gift you can give your kids is a good marriage. I'm not saying go to the opposite extreme. But this will be a good thing. I know it.
    This. It is good to have some time together away from the kids. Some people don't have a problem leaving their kids weekly/monthly for "down time", and that is their business. Others don't leave their kids at all. There has to be a happy medium. Once a year on your anniversary shouldn't be considered excessive.
    Planning 3 trips at once...

  20. #19
    Obsessed Disney Mama 3Princesses1Prince's Avatar
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    We very rarely leave our kids. Yes they've stayed at grandmas house overnight here and there. Usually because we've had an evening wedding or event that brought us home late. It was easier for them to stay at grandmas so grandma could go to bed at a decent time.

    Just this year we've planned more weekends away. With 4 kids we usually split them up between two grandparents if we are gone more than a night. We did DL in january for our anniversary, Vegas in June with another couple, and Tahoe in August for DHs softball tournament. These trips have been so important to our marriage. We are so busy with work, school and the kids activities, we rarely have time to spend together if we are home.

    I say go for it! I do like the idea of a practice run overnight before the big trip. It'll help the kids, you, and grandparents get an idea of what to expect.


  21. #20
    Registered User ALB2277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by leota's necklace View Post
    Precisely. It's the Disney version of putting your own oxygen mask on first.
    love it yes its ok i actualy sugest it we go almost every year one year just wife and i and next year all of us except this next year we cant go so saving to take kids and be there on the 60th
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  22. #21
    Registered User cactusgirl's Avatar
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    I reaffirm the importance of couple time. We had a conference in Tampa and decided to pair it with 3 nights at WDW. The first few hours were fun...and then reality set in--we were in our daughter's most favorite place without her. Both of us felt bad. Our solution was to schedule another trip a few months later that would include our girl. After that, all was good. The same was the case for the DLH a month ago. Once a family trip was scheduled, all was good. Our best all around solution comes when we combine the two--two or three days of just the two of us and then a family member comes up with the juniors and we round it off with a few days of family park time.


  23. #22
    Registered User bumblebeeonarose's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cactusgirl View Post
    then reality set in--we were in our daughter's most favorite place without her
    I was thinking about this when I mentioned DD knowing where we were going. When we went before she just knew we left her with Grandma for the weekend. She was happy and safe. But to go to Disneyland now that she is old enough to want to go too sounds more complicated. But as I said, we would be getting APs, so she would get to go another time. I guess I could just not tell her where we were going, as someone else mentioned. I don't know. I have months until I have to decide that though.

  24. #23
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    y'all are MUCH nicer than I am.

    I've been to WDW without my kids AND without my husband. And my husband's been without us. I will say that I missed them terribly. But they all knew where I was and I never felt bad about that part. We've been going to Disneyland for MouseAdventure without them for years and they always know where we are. The past year or so, our eldest son has joined us when he's been available.

    I have no reason to not tell them. It's not a secret. They learned to deal with it. And they've always been very well cared for and spoiled by someone who loves them and takes good care of them.

    Team Krock - All 5 of Us - Are taking on the Dark Side for the 2015 Star Wars Rebel Challenge (The 10K for the youngest two.)
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  25. #24

    That would be a great trip for the 2 of you. My wife kidnapped me for my 40th b-day and she took me to the Land for 3 days and an Angels Yankees game. What an awesome wife I have. We had an incredible time wandering around together and having fun. Really recharges the batteries.


  26. #25
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    I couldn't help but notice the contrast between this and the other thread asking about bringing a baby to Disneyland. You're actually asking if it's okay for you to go without kids. I love you!!

    Heck yeah it's okay to go without kids! I know that there's this big cliche that "Disneyland is for kids," but it's not actually true. Nowhere in the dedication of Disneyland does it say that the park is supposed to be exclusively for kids. Furthermore, in all the conversations I've had with people who insist on bringing infants and toddlers to Disneyland, it becomes quickly apparent that despite trying to justify themselves with the statement "Disneyland is for kids," they're really going because they want to go and they're not about to let their own kids stop them. And then big kicker, the corollary of the statement "Disneyland is for kids": no one is actually obligated to bring their kids to Disneyland. My parents never took me, neither did my fiancee's, nor a lot of people I know. I'm sure it's great to share it with them (and I think you're doing awesome by waiting at least two more years, so they'll come within spitting distance of remembering it as something special), but you're not a bad parent if you don't take them.

    So yeah, you're not a bad parent if you don't bring your kids to Disneyland, Disney is not for kids exclusively, and if you want to go because you want to go, then ditch the kids and take a getaway for just you two. Don't feel guilty about it at all!


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