Amanda Parr - April 2003 - Fort Wilderness Cabins, Port Orleans French Quarter

Time of Year: Spring
Travel Method: Personal Car
Resort: FWC, PORFQ
Accommodations: Campsite, Standard
Ages Represented in Group: Pre-School, Adult
WDW Experience Represented in Group: Veteran
Comments: The perfect new job requires the perfect last vacation before returning to the grind. Though Amanda's husband doesn't get the Disney World thing, she had his blessing for a solo trip with their son.

Amanda Parr -- April 2003 -- Walt Disney World (FWC, POFQ)

Friday, April 11

Great news! I got a job! Not just any job, the absolutely perfect job for me. Working out of my home, doing recruiting and marketing for the Girl Scouts, helping volunteers get oriented and start up troops, work with other non-profits to put together programs, you get the idea.

What does any sane person do when they are handed a big coup on the football field of life? I looked straight into the camera and said, "I'm going to Disney World!"

We still had Annual Passes for Miles and me, burning a hole in my pocket, that would expire before the new job would allow me any vacation time. Not wanting to let my passes down, I concocted a "cheap" trip to sell to hubby, who of course had absolutely no interest in going. Well, that just let me decide for sure to tent camp at Fort Wilderness. I also had a new Eureka tent and nice comfy cots begging to be broken in, and so Miles and I got kisses and hugs from Daddy, and off we went, minivan loaded with a new tower oscillating fan from Wal Mart to beat the heat in the tent, an extension cord, a cd player, a tent, cots, sheets, pillows, beach towels, bug spray, sunscreen, shower shoes, you name it, I think we brought it.

Drive hit a big ol' snag outside of Mobile, an accident in the tunnel that goes under the bay and then up onto the bay bridge had it totally closed. What a mess. The detour added about an hour to our drive, and it was not fun that the air conditioner on the minivan had broken the day before this trip, so that it wasn't really working unless you are a high gear, and not accelerating hard. So we did most of that extra hour with the windows rolled down, in stop and start bumper to bumper traffic. Blechh. We must have hit the problem right after it started, too, because we got through at all. I imagine anyone coming into Mobile a half hour to hour after us would have been facing an impossible scene.

Got a motel at Priceline for tonight, around $48 total I think after all the taxes and fees, at a La Quinta in Tallahassee right off I-10. We stopped at Cracker Barrell for dinner in Clearwater, Florida, past Pensacola, and it wasn't that great. I think it's just this one, the food was off. Too bad, it's the perfect place to stop and gas up. Miles got a couple of new toys, one of which he is still playing with months later, a "Magnetic House" that is a tin that opens up, with about 30 little magnetic pieces of furniture, pets, and people.

We checked into La Quinta around 8:30 p.m., took baths and watched a little t.v. Miles was out by 10:30, and me... I couldn't sleep. Not at all. All of my trepidation about going back to work, not being home for Miles anymore, worries about the tasks ahead of me at the new job, and just plain old too-much-caffeine-on-the-road had me falling asleep around 4:30 a.m., finally. Yuck.

Like the stops at the Clearwater Cracker Barrell, I am x-ing off splitting up the drive in a motel, I'm just going to drive it straight through in the future. It's a waste of time and money for us.

Best thing today: the "Magnet House"
Worst thing today: insomnia

Saturday, April 12

Miles woke me up around 8:30 a.m. We got out on the road, both of us not feeling like eating just yet. About 10 a.m., after the turn south onto the Interstate we got off and went through a McDonald's for some breakfast.

Made an obligatory stop in Ocala to visit the Welcome Center. Be warned, that exit is getting terribly congested because of road work on the main road that goes under the interstate overpass. I hope they are done with the work by our next trip in December, or I may just skip our Ocala visit altogether.

The Welcome Center didn't have any characters roaming around while we were there, but Miles did some pin trading and we got a coke and relaxed for a few minutes.

I wanted to stop at a grocery store and pick up some stuff for camp, so we came down the back way through Clermont and stopped for gas and groceries at one of the huge new minimall complexes in the Four Corners area.

Just a month or two earlier, I had been up for a job at a nature center on Lake Apopka, and we had settled on a subdivision & public school in Clermont to move to. We had the van reserved, and the house ready to list on the market... it was not to be. All is for the best, as I drove through Clermont I thought "this is too rural, A.G. (my husband) would have really hated it here". He wouldn't be so thrilled about the area just because it's 30 minutes from Disney World, you see. Can you imagine? I don't know where that man's priorities are sometimes.

The Publix we stopped at, by the way, had the BEST health food selection I've ever seen in a chain supermarket. Maybe it's just Louisiana where no one understands or cares about a healthy diet, but I was really amazed and delighted. Stacked the basket with snack food free of hydrogenated oil & Cliff brand soy meal replacement bars which Miles loves.

After a wrong turn down the back of an almost-empty older resort and some completely empty older motel on 192, I found my way onto Disney property and went right past the Animal Kingdom Lodge, and then to Fort Wilderness Resort.

Check-in is always pain free now that Miles is old enough to sit and enjoy the cartoons at the kids' area in the lobbies. He trotted over happily with a coloring book and pack of crayons the desk clerk handed him, and by the time I was ready to leave, he had an older gentleman handing him money to do the pressed penny machine. On our last trip, he had an older gentleman handing him quarters to make wishes in the fountain at the Germany pavilion in Epcot. Usually it's teenage girls he has lavishing him with goodies wherever we go, but at WDW he seems to charm the pants off of the seniors.

I was lucky to get a campsite when I called two weeks earlier, because the clerk told me that they had totally sold out Fort Wilderness for the week. When I made my reservation, all that had been left were "Preferred Sites", and in person now I asked if I could be Downgraded to a standard site. So many people post on internet message boards asking how to get Upgraded upon checkin, I found it kind of amusing to be trying to get Downgraded. Two reasons - I didn't want to pay the extra money for something I wouldn't use (sewer and cable hookups) and I didn't want to tent camp next to someone running a generator on their rv all night.

They did have a site to switch me to, and expecting to find throngs throughought the sold out resort, instead it was peaceful and relaxed as ever. The whole trip I was pleasantly surprised that the dreaded "Peak Season" wasn't really any problem for us at all. After all, this *was* the infamous "don't go, it's horribly crowded" Easter Week.

The only thing I didn't like were the prices for the resorts, I'm used to paying off-season Annual Pass rates, and booking at the last minute I paid rack rate all the way. But everything else was fine. Busses weren't any more noticeably crowded, fastpass worked great for almost every situation that could have had us waiting in line, the extended hours at all the parks added wonderful flexibility to the trip, and the weather wasn't too hot or too cold.

The only place that was ever miserably crowded was, of course, the Magic Kingdom, especially after about 11:00 a.m. on Maundy Thursday, an Extra Magic Hour day. Watching the sweating, sardine-packed, overheated people trying to have a "good time" in Fantasyland around 2 p.m. that day, knowing that most of the poor souls were only there for four days, I was sooo glad we were leaving the next morning and that we'd already been there a week. But I'm jumping ahead of myself... Anyways, from this experience, I would say go the week before Easter and leave or stay out of the Magic Kingdom any time around Easter weekend.

Pitching the tent turned out to be way hotter and more exhausting than I thought it would be. I didn't get a campsite with much shade, and the sun beating off the white sand on the pads really made me miserable. Finally, I got it up, and took Miles down to the boat dock to rent a Water Mouse, and call my local friend Denise to come meet us for dinner at 'Ohana that evening.

I was really looking forward to taking Miles out on the boat, and we had a great time, until we started hitting other boats' wakes towards the end of the run, and water sprayed up and splashed us. That, I was told, was not good, and was not appreciated. He did not want me to go fast anymore, oh well. You should have seen me trying to get the darn thing back into the dock, actually, I'm glad you didn't. It was kind of embarrassing -- let's just say it required three passes and two CM's shouting at me from the dock. So I'm not Capt. Nemo.

We played around in the Petting Zoo a little, and on the playground, until Denise showed up to meet us. We were still a couple of hours away from our dinner time, and we had talked about renting bikes, but the heat had just beat me silly putting up the tent, and then the sun out on the water had got me a bit tired as well. Miles must have felt the same, because he opted for a monorail ride instead of a bike ride.

We took the ferry to Wilderness Lodge and got Miles some chicken nuggets and ourselves a snack, and then ferried over to the Contemporary, where we walked up to the monorail stop, transferred at the TTC and rode the loop to Epcot and back. Miles nodded off in my lap just about the time we were approaching the TTC again.

Have you ever carried a 35 pound sleeping toddler? They are very heavy! LOL By the time we got into the upstairs lobby at the Polynesian with him, I was thrilled to sit down. A cast member who does charicatures was just opening shop in the seating area we were in, and we grownups all had a nice, leisurely chat while Miles napped.

About 20 minutes before he was scheduled to go to the Neverland Club for a little babysitting, I woke Miles up, so he'd have time to recover from any post-nap grogginess. I don't know if was just being disoriented and still tired, or if it was the fact that the Neverland Club was being run entirely by teenagers/young adults, but he didn't have a good time here. He has informed me that Simba's Clubhouse at the Animal Kingdom Lodge is the only kids' club he will go to from now on. Simba's had been staffed on his visit by two older ladies who just lovey doveyed all over him, played board games with him, and the club itself was a much smaller and a more sedate atmosphere than the Neverland Club, perhaps better suited to small children. I think older elementary age children would like the Neverland Club a lot, though. One of Miles' complaints was he was too little to play any of the video games they had in the Neverland Club game room. We'll try Neverland again when he's 7 or older, but for my December trip it looks like my dining evening out with grownups may be limited to Jiko or Boma. Not a bad fate.

Dinner at 'Ohana with Denise was great. I didn't care for the shrimp, they looked wonderful but were defrosted, surprise, surprise, I don't know why I keep trying to eat seafood at Disney. Well, they came with the skewer. The appetizers were my favorite part of the meal, and the turkey and steak were quite good. Though it is supposed to be unlimited, the waitress only came around to us twice, and we really had to wait awhile for that second visit. For the price, I think they could have kept it coming a bit better than that, though they were completely full with guests.

The coconut race through the restaurant was populated by a bunch of high school seniors in gowns and tuxedos for prom night, which was fun to watch! And our table right at the window with a view of the castle was a great way to start off a week's vacation at Disney World.

After picking Miles up from the club, and apologizing to him for the crummy time he said he had, and promising to never, ever leave him there again, and receiving my instructions re. Simba's Clubhouse for future times when I go "eat grown up food", we took a stroll through the grounds, and I decided it was just too cold and the wind was whipping too hard to stick with our original plan to watch fireworks from the beach.

I bid good evening to Denise, and Miles and I headed onto the ferry for a ride over to the Magic Kingdom. This is what I love about having an Annual Pass, being able to go into one of the parks for just an hour or two, on a whim. We got up in front of the Plaza Restaurant at the end of Main Street about 12 minutes before the fireworks were scheduled to begin, and a very sweet couple with two older boys offered to move their camera bag and backpacks off of a chair for us, right at the rail. I put Miles on my lap, talked with the nice family a bit, and then down came Tinkerbell from the castle, and up went the fireworks and ahhhhhh.

The ferry back to Fort Wilderness brought with it another great conversation with a fellow guest, this time a gentleman in maybe his early 40's, who had a sleeping tiny daughter around his neck, and two jabbering preteen daughters next to him, and he reported he had TWO MORE teenage daughters waiting for him back at camp, with his wife, all in one RV. God bless that man!

It wasn't hard at all falling asleep tonight. We were kind of cold before dawn, but it turned out to be the only really cool night of the whole trip. By midweek it was absolutely sweltering, even at night. That's something about tent camping here that I don't like -- the weather is just too variable to plan a decent trip. Well, make that, the weather is too variable when it's not just plain hideously hot. The conditions and temperatures seem to whip around randomly in the spring.

May through October is easy: HOT. November and December are more predictably nice, but I had a friend who camped this past December at Fort Wilderness, and was treated to two days of torrential rain and then near-freezing temperatures, so I wouldn't put that month high on a list of great times to tent camp at WDW.

Best thing today: catching fireworks at the Magic Kingdom on a whim, and having people around us be so generous and friendly

Worst thing today: Miles not enjoying the Neverland Club

Sunday, April 13

No Mickey phone call here in a tent, I set the travel alarm expecting a beep beep beep at 8:00 a.m. but... no! Wrong sound... back up that alarm by about an hour and half because ladies and gentlemen, here's the one, the only "Dawn Chorus", coming live and loud at... dawn.

There are a lot of birds with healthy lungs in Fort Wilderness, and they all sang for me starting around 6:30 a.m. today. Woke me right up. That's ok, by day three I learned to sleep through it, but the neighbors cooking breakfast, though they were doing it as quietly as anyone can, was still enough noise to wake me up too early every subsequent morning. Maybe I'm getting too old to sleep through the night, already. I thought that happened when you're in your 80's, but hey, I'm an early bloomer.

Miles was totally sacked out, I hated to wake him, so I snuck off to the bathroom quickly, about 25 yards right behind us, was back in under five minutes, and Miles was up and crying, freaked out, looking for me. Darn!! That is the only time I think since his *birth* I have ever left him unsupervised and of course he wakes up. My crunching on the path away from the tent must have woke him up. Oh well, didn't try that again.

He was up now, both of us with way too little sleep, but we were excited to be here, so there was no getting back in bed, we just started to prepare for the day. It was a pain in the patooky, trying to remember what to bring in and out of the van to the tent to the bathroom to the tent to the bathroom to the van to the bag to take to the parks... I never had everything I needed in the right place at the right time. I think I need to have more kids just to have some porters.

On the up side, the bathrooms here at Spanish Moss Lane were spotless, and with the campground full, there were still plenty of toilets and showers and sinks for everyone. The only thing they need to address is MATS FOR THE SHOWERS instead of making you stand in puddles on a cement floor while you're trying to get dressed. That's just yuck, and there's always little bits of grass and sand mixed in.

Miles was not happy about getting into this weird shower, he usually takes baths at home, and he did a lot of whining about it this morning. I still managed to get us both showered, and then we brushed our teeth and I dried my hair while he, bored out of his mind by now, started looking for things to do, like see who was behind the curtains in the showers. Lord, I put a stop to that quickly before there were any incidents or anyone noticed.

The good part about being woken up so early was that we were in a great position to take advantage of today's Extra Magic Hour at the Magic Kingdom, which we did! I had planned to sleep in and go somewhere else today, but switched plans to take advantage of the EMH. (Doesn't that stand for Emergency Medical Helicopter? Rings a bell.)

I took along some bottles of water and juice for later, and we ate pop tarts and bananas and milk from the ice chest (put ice in it last night, let it melt today and never refilled it.. just bottled drinks left in there after this morning), I downed a couple of Starbucks bottled Frappucinos like shots of Whiskey, and we headed for the internal bus stop.

The busses used to be really confusing at Fort Wilderness, so much so that I can't even explain to you now what was so confusing about them. Now they're easy. If you want to go to the "front" of the campground where there's the check-in lobby and the bus to Epcot and other places that are clearly marked, you catch the "Outpost" bus from your loop. If want to go to the stuff on Bay Lake, like the boat to the Magic Kingdom, the restaurant, and the busses to the Studios (I can't remember which end the busses to the Animal Kingdom, or the water parks or Downtown Disney leave from, just look at the map at each stop when you go) and Wilderness Lodge and the TTC, you catch the "Trading Post" bus from your loop.

Your campground loop will be on a color-coded route. Spanish Moss was on "Purple". When you're headed home, either from Outpost or Trading Post, you catch your color bus. That's all there is to it. The drivers were announcing each loop by name as we approached it, too.

From the Trading Post area, we caught a launch to the Magic Kingdom, and were walking up Main Street in no time at all.

Miles mecca of Disneydom recently is the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, and walking onto it with a two minute wait is pure heaven. From there, we were able to hit Snow White, Dumbo, Peter Pan, Small World, and the Carousel before 10:30 a.m. Amazing! I am SOOOOOO happy that Extra Magic Hour is back, it totally makes your trip, when you're trying to tour Fantasyland with a small child.

Miles wanted to eat at Cosmic Ray's so we went and had about a ten to fifteen minute wait for them to open, and were first in line to order. I got a really good Chicken Ceasar Salad, and a chicken sandwich for Miles, and we chilled with the mellow lounge stylings of Sonny Eclipse.

After lunch, we had the delightful opportunity to see Carousel of Progress, another terrific reason to be here during a "Peak" week. Much to my surprise, Miles loved it. Absolutely loved it. He loved the song, he loved the animatronics, he loved seeing inside all the houses, he loved the animatronic dog the best.

Next was Miles other favorite Tomorrowland thing, the TTC. He could kind of care less about the Buzz Lightyear ride (I think the colors and sounds are a bit too nightmarish for him, and he doesn't play video games yet, can't really aim yet, etc.) or the Speedway (did it twice last October and got his fill I think), and he's too little for Alien or Space Mountain, and I can't ride the Rocket Rods because I feel like I'm going to be thrown out of the ride vehicle and it totally freaks me out, so if Carousel hadn't been open, we would have had the TTC and nothing else. I wish they would put a live Buzz Lightyear show in the big amphitheater a few times a day, so there's something for little kids here.

Time to leave the scant pickings of Tommorrowland -- we took the "secret walkway" to Toontown. Made a potty stop, and then played with the gas tank and car outside the restrooms. I hope we can get out to Disneyland someday while Miles is still little, he would ADORE their Toontown.

Goofy's Barnstormer had too long a wait so I talked Miles into just seeing some characters at the Hall of Fame and of course we had to take a tour of Mickey and Minnie's homes. Miles spends about 10 minutes in Minnie's kitchen every time we go, he just can't get enough of the microwave and oven effects. He really wanted to play in the kiddie playground, but he's officially too tall! After years of complaining about parents who let kids that are too tall into the toddler areas in the parks, I just said no and followed my own rules. If it had been uncrowded, I probably would have let him play, under close supervision, he's pretty respectful on the playground and careful of smaller children. But it was very busy, and I just thought it best to go on to something else.

Hopped the train around to Frontierland. I got Miles over to the Big Thunder Mountain fastpass area, but he declined to ride, "too fast" and also passed on Splash Mountain, "too big a waterfall". So we did Country Bears (I'm ***really*** over this attraction, someone please remind me your kids are only small for a little while).

Walked back to the ferry over to Tom Sawyer Island, and had a great time running back and forth. Miles made some friends in the fort, and it was hard to get him to leave. The twin boys he was pal-ing around with's Mom and I sat on some barrels in the courtyard and chatted for a bit. When her husband showed up with their twin girls (!!), we closed down the party and I eventually extracted Miles from the maze of stairs and walkways overhead with some vague threats. I remember so clearly how just a year or two ago, I had to walk behind him so carefully here. Now I could barely keep track of him up there. Time flies.

We walked over to Aunt Polly's (open now because it was a "Peak" week, where when I've tried to go in off season lately it's been closed) for a snack and a rest. I got a kid's PB & J lunch pack -- I ate the PB & J and Miles ate the chips and a Cliff Bar from my bag, and we split a coke.

Heading back to the ferry landing, the Share a Dream Come True "snowglobe" parade was coming through Frontierland, and we stopped along the walkway to watch for a minute, but Miles didn't really care, he was more interested in climbing on the fence. He gets a little wild when he gets tired, so we just ran through the caves one more time, then headed back across the water.

I wanted to come back tonight for Spectromagic, so I got us out of the Magic Kingdom and on a boat "home" for a nap. Back at the tent, it was bloody hot. I mean HOT in that tent. I had left all the window flaps open, and it was only in the lower 80's today, but the sun was just *beating* down, and even with our tower fan, it was too uncomfortable in there. After 45 sweaty minutes, with me dozing a bit while Miles played with his magnet house and read books, I gave up. He hasn't napped much since he turned four.

We changed into some fresh clothes, hit the bathrooms, and headed back to the Magic Kingdom for the evening.

Had our dinner at Columbia Harbor House, which was great as usual. We sat upstairs (which has been closed sometimes in the past, always a disappointment, but, you got it, on a "Peak" week was open). I love the room over the walkway to Fantasyland. A fantastic Cast Member took a little break from his bussing duties to play with Miles. Miles had lot to tell him. The guy promised him a surprise. We finished eating and the CM hadn't come back, so Miles suddenly bolted off "to look for him". I mean he got away from me fast! There was hardly a soul up there, so I wasn't too worried, and in a minute Miles came trotting back to me with the CM in tow, who gave Miles a bag of Mickey Mouse cookies and made a little kid's day. On our way out the door, Miles had to show a couple of tables of guests his surprise.

Had to do the Haunted Mansion right across the street, Miles is getting braver about the attic room where the "guys pop up and say Ahhhh!", as Miles explains it. He only hid his face in my chest *after* seeing "guys pop up", and quickly came back up to catch the next appearance. Someday he's going to be 6' and stinky and hairy, riding in a Doom Buggy ahead of mine all by himself. I bet he'll still flinch a little, inside, lol.

Miles wanted to see Peter Pan again, but the line was about 45 minutes, no way. The Fastpass time would have cut into the parade time, so I took us back through Liberty Square, first to the potties in the Adventureland cut-through, and then we did Aladdin's Magic Carpets. This is another ride I am *over* but Miles is definitely a big fan.

The loader messed up loading, not sure what happened, but an older guy got left without a seat somehow, and seperated from his wife and three grandkids. We couldn't see the ride operator from our side of the ride at the time, and instead of holding everyone up, he gave up and walked out. Kind of a shame, he had waited in a good 15 minute line like the rest of us. He should have said something, I'm sure the operator would have let the family stay on, and then add him, for a second time around, but I don't think they spoke English very well.

I walked us back up to check out the Peter Pan line, still a mess, but now there was a better Fastpass return time, it looked like we'd miss the fireworks but we'd seen those the night before, so in went the Annual Passes and out came the Fastpasses.

We got a great spot about 25 minutes before the parade, along the curb on the lagoon side of Frontierland, right in front of an ice cream cart. We were just in time to get a spot to sit at the curb -- the route was really filling up tonight. Hey, it *is* Peak season. Miles swore up one side of the hill and down another he wanted a bomb popsicle, the kind with different flavors, and even though it was enormous and I knew he'd never finish half of it, I bought him one. He ate about a third of it, not bad seeming it was roughly equal in length to his head. He took a stab at going out into the street with cast members leading group games, but quickly came back to me, I think because it was getting dark and he couldn't see me very well from out there.

I've never seen Spectromagic, and I've heard a lot of raves about it, so maybe my expectations were really high. I liked the Peacock float, and Jiminy Cricket at the end, and Cinderella in her pumpkin coach, but most of the rest of it I found kind of dated and even ugly or nightmarish. Miles was frightened by the villains a bit. He wants to see it again next time we visit, so it must not have been too scary for him.

We used our Peter Pan fastpass, then, to avoid the forecastle crowds, I walked us out via Adventureland. A cast member was standing outside of Pirates, looking toward the castle, and another CM passed by, and I heard her say the fireworks were about to start. It wasn't a great view, but we stopped to watch. Afterwards, even though Miles was begging to go on more rides, I was cooked like an Easter ham & done for the day. We got out ahead of most of the post-fireworks crowds, by racing through the Emporium. It's easy to travel fast with just two. There wasn't a mass exodus yet, as there was going to be another Spectromagic and the park didn't close until late tonight.

As we waited for our ferry to Fort Wilderness, what should come by but the Electrical Water Parade! That was a treat. I put Miles up on a bench so he could see. We ferried past it, and beat it to the beach the campground, where we walked down a little onto the sand and waited to see it come by again. It wasn't quite as horribly loud as it seemed to me a couple of years ago, but then I was on the dock, and this time I was on the beach, a more comfortable distance, I think.

The Trading Post bus stop seemed really overwhelmed, and people were worried about there not being room for everyone, I could feel all the anxiety rising around me. But I've never seen Disney not send extra busses when they're needed, and honestly I don't think this year's Easter crowds were like past years, from the stories I've heard, so there were probably extra busses. We had to wait for a second Purple, but all in all it wasn't more than 10 to 15 minutes, and I think they were handling Hoop De Doo letting out, the Water Parade crowds leaving, and the post-fireworks MK exodus *and* the post-Fantasmic Studios exodus folks were likely all starting to hit right then. We had to stand, but it was only a three minute ride to our loop.

Again, no trouble falling hard asleep for either of us tonight! I skipped my usual bedtime water or diet soda, so I wouldn't have to abandon my child in the woods again tomorrow morning.

Best thing today: Carousel of Progress
Worst thing today: Heat in the tent, dealing with the bathroom being seperate from the tent, and those freaky midget red haired slasher glowing goalie mask demon people at the opening of Spectromagic

Monday, April 14

Rise and shine and try to remember what to bring to the bathroom. This morning the birds woke me, but I was able to go back to sleep, but then our neighbors cooking quietly was enough to wake me up for good, around 7:30 a.m.

Showers still a pain with a four year old, and puddly. Didn't bother to try and stay and blow dry my hair today.

There was a nice family across the road from us in a big deluxe pop-up with a screen porch, and the mom took a shine to Miles. Miles always has a lot to impart to anyone willing to stop and hear him out.

We caught the bus to the Outpost, with some breakfast snacks in my pack, and headed for Epcot.

Miles hadn't had quite enough sleep, he was kind of cranky and weepy this morning. This park is so big, and he seemed tired enough, that I got a stroller here. As we walked into the park, he reminded me that I told him he could have ONE toy this trip, and ONE pin. He asked to go straight into Mouse Gears and buy them right now. OK by me, really Mouse Gears is the least crowded in the early morning I think.

Bought a couple of t-shirts for him to wear over the summer, and I barely made myself pass on a theme park attraction-themed desk set that was huge and clunky and expensive and wonderful. Good thing I did, turns out I'm working from home and only go into our office once or twice a week, and there would have been no room for it on my home desk.

On our way out, I saw a guy running a kiosk selling vouchers for the "Crystal Magic" your-head-in-a-plexiglass-cube thing that is in the Imagination Pavilion. Big sucker that I am, I shelled out... awww I don't want to say, it's too silly.... for a cube with Miles' head and Tinker Bell, to be created over at the Imagination pavilion (we'd have to go over there and show our voucher), and shipped to our Package Delivery pickup point at Fort Wilderness within a day or two. This was our Father's Day gift for Daddy, back home, and it's proudly on top of our t.v. armoire in the bedroom now, he was really thrilled with it. Good thing, because the experience of having it made and then actually trying to have it show up somewhere for me to pick it up wasn't the greatest. But I'm jumping ahead...

Miles picked out a Sleeping Beauty pvc figure set, he has every single one now. What a deprived little boy. He'll outgrow the pvc thing eventually, but they've been his toy of choice since he could grasp them as an infant. Trucks, blocks, could care less. Just wants little plastic characters and animals, which he calls "people". He wanted a Winnie the Pooh ride pin, and I got myself one of the Infrared "Magical Moments" pins, which frankly I found to be a big bust just because I couldn't find anywhere comfortable to pin it where it didn't keep falling off and losing its backs all day. I ran through every extra back I had on the trip, trying to repin that thing to the straps on my bag. It was just too hot to be wearing a big ol piece of plastic on your shirt. Miles really didn't care much about it after a while, and it didn't light up much of anywhere outside of Epcot Future World and the Magic Kingdom for us. I give it a Yawn. I won't be buying "Pal Mickey" I guess.

Leaving the store, a security guy gave me a couple extra looks, because we stopped right outside the store's back door and ripped right into the playset, so Miles could hold some of the figures. But then I guess he saw the bag and figured we couldn't be *that* brazen, and didn't question me.

Miles had been on the fence about Test Track, and I talked him into at least getting measured for it. He was tall enough, barely, but the loud sound of the cars on the track over the front entrance really convinced him this was "too fast" and I couldn't get him to try it just once. So we hiked over to our old standby, Ellen's Energy Adventure.

I don't know how I can ride this over and over again and still enjoy it. I keep thinking, oh no, not that again, when Miles says he wants to go in it, but then we do it and I have a great time. Maybe I just like the dark and the air conditioning, and sitting with my son for a while. I really like the silent gliding of the ride vehicles, it's like a boat ride without water, and I could listen to Ellen Degeneris read the phone book.

We had to do Spaceship Earth now, it had been hard to pass it up on entering the park. This has turned into our signature Epcot thing. I love Jeremy Iron's voice, and Miles has a specific idea about a couple of the animatronics that he always shares with me: the Egyptian making papyrus is Tarzan, and the newsboy is Miles! I like the Phoenecian shoreline of yore, and we both dig the earth when you break out into the dome.

I stepped into the Guest Relations building and made a priority seating for 12:15 p.m. at the San Angel Inn, after a little debate with Miles whether we wanted to go there, or the Garden Grill, or just get nuggets from the McDonald's stand.

I figured we'd have time to go get the cube thing made over at Imageworks, the exhibit area and gift shop at the exit of the Imagination with Figment ride. Not sure why, but all of a sudden here was a big ol' crowd of people on this side of the park, and most of them were stuffed in Imageworks. The people doing the photo imaging were swamped, and not very responsive to me for a while.

After about 15 minutes, our timer was running out, and I was about to give up and come back later. The guy took us right then, and spent a very perfunctory amount of time with us. Miles' head came out a lot smaller in the cube than their samples showed it would, which just wasted the substantial money I spent buying a larger sized cube, but there was no way to tell that from what you could see here at the imaging station -- you'd only know when you saw the finished product.

I would suggest that if you want to do this, get the cheapest one, and insist on spending as much time as you need to get a good image. Then, pick it up in person at their counter there in the Imagination pavilion, that afternoon or the next day, whenever they tell you it will be ready, and if you don't like it, make them redo it. It's a lot of money, and I just saw an ad on Monster.com for the folks doing the imaging and selling the items. The company is not Disney, the whole thing is outsourced, and they weren't paying these guys much over minimum wage, with no Disney benefits, so don't feel like you're hurting the employees any if you try and get your money's worth out of the overlords.

The nice young man at the kiosk in Mouse Gears had filled out a long piece of paperwork to have this thing sent to package pickup at the Meadows Trading Post, in the middle of Fort Wilderness, within 2 days. Didn't happen. I'll tell you more on Wednesday's report.

We were a little late for our Mexico p.s. now, due to the mob scene in Imageworks. San Angel made it all better. It's so restful in here. People complain that it's dark, but that's the whole appeal to me. The volcano is cool, the lighting is wonderful, the food is good, and the service, while slow, is caring. We got to sit right along the rail to the boat ride, finally! I've been coming here almost every trip for a few years now, and have never gotten a waterside table before. Miles had a great time waving to people going by on the boats. Another thing I like about eating here -- the lighting gets people to talk in a hushed tone, and Miles is exceptionally sedate and quiet in here. Makes for a really nice break.

Went on the boat ride ourselves afterwards, so we could wave at our empty table. I enjoy the Aztec men in feather thongs, Miles likes the fireworks on the ceiling and the films of people swimming and diving.

Tummies full, I could tell Miles needed a rest, so I coaxed him into his stroller, snapped up his sun shade, made a pillow for him out of my bag, and told him to just lay back and rest. We walked all the way over to France, and when I peered into the stroller while parking it outside the movie theater, he was just nodding out. Picked him up and let him fall asleep on my shoulder while we waited for the kids running the pavilion to open the doors.

The girl giving the welcome speech was doing it for the very first time, with her "trainer" coaching her along. She made a couple mistakes and had to be reminded of a couple of lines, but always with a big smile, and when she finished everyone cheered for her. Her performance was tres charmant.

I have never seen this movie all the way through, it was really lovely. Perfect for holding a sleeping four year old. The seats could use a little refurbishing, they are getting a bit "springy".

Couldn't believe it, but Miles stayed asleep after the movie, didn't wake up when I dumped him back in the stroller, and by the time I got to China and waited for 15 minutes for the acrobats, and watched the acrobats, and went into the Temple of Heaven, and waited for 10 minutes for the Silk Music, and watched the silk music, and waited 15 minutes for another Silk Music performance -- just as that one was about to begin, he woke up. Wow! Talk about a power nap. Probably 2 hours total, that's really long for him. WDW takes it out of you, that's for sure.

I let him wake up during a second silk music performance and then we went to Norway for Maelstrom. Too long a wait, so I got us a Fastpass and we spent an hour eating pastries from the Kringla bakery (don't miss this place, man oh man they really have good stuff, and I'm a pastry snob) and letting Miles play on the Viking ship. He finally learned to go down the rope, which is really the only thing to do here besides running back and forth. The older boys around him weren't too patient with him, I had to stay on top of the situation or he never would have gotten a turn, he was mixing it up with the big dogs. He was really, really proud of himself and excited.

Wish he could have been as excited about the displays in the Stave Church, but our visit there lasted maybe 2 minutes. We still had time to kill before our Fastpass return, so we dawdled around the gift shop, and he found a book he really liked, about a little girl who buys a real Viking ship through a classified ad in the paper. I know, I know, I said "one toy" but my Dad the English teacher would never say no to a good book when I was growing up, and I like to do the same for my son if I can. Books aren't toys, they're the world, right? Oh, and my mom was a librarian. ;-)

A trip to the Norwegian potties and NOW it was Fastpass return time. This ride is really, really short. I feel for anyone who waits in line for it very long. I don't know why I thought the waterfall thing was scary the first time I rode it, now it seems like nothing. The trolls are well done, and going backwards is fun. Miles didn't want to stay and watch the movie.

He was hungry for some real food now, and he really wanted to ride Living With the Land, so we went back over to the Land pavilion. Living With the Land's Fastpass machines were closing for the day, and the ride had a 35 minute wait. Yuck. I got Miles his requisite chicken strips and I just had a coke, still full from the tire-sized "School Bread" I ate over at Norway.

As a consolation prize for Living With the Land we did Spaceship Earth again, and then I bought a cd of Disney lullabies to listen to at bedtime tonight on our battery operated cd player, and we caught the bus home to our tent.

Hit the potty, called home, grabbed a blanket out of the van and a flashlight and some snacks, and off we went via internal bus, to the Meadows Campfire. Tonight was "Mulan", which I was actually up for seeing. I can't get excited about old Disney movies anymore, I've seen all of them too many times at this point.

The singalong was fun, we put our blanket on the ground right in front of the screen and so were some of the first people to be approached by Chip & Dale, which gave us a chance to get s'mores fixings and drinks at the concession stand while most everyone else was glued to their seats awaiting the characters.

By the time we roasted a couple marshmallows, and discovered Miles doesn't like marshmallows, but would be happy to help eat the Hershey bar , the movie started. Our place near the screen was great. Next time, I'd bring real pillows, because I found that from about halfway back toward the benches, if you had something to prop your head up, you could just lie down and snuggle and watch the show up above you.

Towards the last third of the movie, Miles started getting restless and wanted to dance around and start tossing gravel, but I managed to wrangle him back onto the blanket in a seated position with a couple of half-nelson holds and some more chocolate.

The bus "home" was a snap. I really wanted some clean clothes for tomorrow, and chanced having our stuff stolen by throwing it all in a couple of washers tonight, knowing I'd be up before I wanted to in the morning to go throw it in the dryers.

The evening bathroom scene was frought with confusion as usual, I think this time I forgot to bring pajamas over there.

Again, sleep fell down on the stage of our day like a lead curtain. Sorry, that was really bad, but, you know, zzzzzzzzz.....

Best thing about today: School Bread at the Kringla bakery in Norway
Worst thing about today: Being just plain worn out and tired of the heat and the bright sun here

Tuesday, April 15

They're cooking at the site next to me, the birds are singing... and my tent is filling up with sand. Note to self: Put "Broom" on the list of stuff to bring camping.

I just dilly dallied this morning. We had to wait for all our stuff to get done in the dryers, which took about an hour. Miles played with some older kids at the the tetherball pole that was between our tent and the bathrooms, and then we were playing chase and he slipped on ice that had fallen out onto the cement in front of the ice machine and hurt himself a little.

Tears dried, we ran into our popup neighbor across the road, and she invited Miles to come and tour their camper. He was duly impressed, it was like the greatest thing in the universe for him. He came back out beaming.

Folded our clothes, put 'em away, cleaned up the back of the van a bit, it was looking like a bomb went off in there.

Took the internal bus to the Trading Post for breakfast seatings at Trail's End. The food was good, the waitress really sweet. To my surprise, Miles barely ate three bites of anything, and seeing that, she was kind enough not to charge me $9.95 for his buffet, which I really appreciated. It wasn't much after 9 a.m. but there were no crowds in here this morning, the place was downright quiet. I've seen it busier in early December.

Miles had been saying for a while now, since we began discussing visiting the Studios today, that he wanted to see the show with the Indians. After a few incomprehensible attempts to say it for me slowly and clearly, I finally caught "Indian Junk Show" out of him. Ha ha ha ha. So we paid our buffet bill and told the waitress we were off to see the Indian Junk Show at the Studios.

At the bus stop, getting on our Studios bus, Miles told the driver that we'd like to go to the Indian Junk Show please.

Well, inside the Studios we browsed for a little while in the fabulous store where I found way better jewelry than what I'd seen at Mouseworks, and way better adult clothes, too. Bought myself a Pooh shirt because FINALLY I found a t-shirt with a V-Neck collar! I hate regular t-shirts, and there's been nothing for me to choose from but regular banded collar tees or tank tops for years.

When we walked over to the Indian Junk Show, it was just about 5 minutes from starting the first showing of the day, and we sat right down, no wait. Maybe everyone was at lunch, or this was just a good day to be at the Studios -- we never saw a crowd here today.

The Indiana Jones Stunt Spectacular was a first for both of us. It was all right. Neither of us are like "whoo hoo that blewed up real good" or into watching knife fights, but the crowd interaction was entertaining and there was some decent comedy from the mc's. The sets were impressive. Miles would have preferred to get up and leave halfway through, I think.

Walked over to the Animation Courtyard area, carefully avoiding the villains in front of the Big *** Hat so they wouldn't get us. Saw the showtime for Voyage of the Little Mermaid was *now* and we ran, to barely make it into the back of their packed waiting room. I think they closed the turnstiles four or five people after us. Miles didn't like this one much because we were toward the front and the water from the water screen got him wet. He also wasn't thrilled with the big Ursula right in his face. We both loved the blacklight puppet Under the Sea number.

Had the chance to then RUN across the courtyard into Playhouse Disney right as they were about to close the doors, and we finally got a spot towards the back of the theater. You can see the stage much better from the back. If you sit close, sometimes you can't see half the puppets at all. This, like Country Bears, is one attraction I will be happy to bid farewell to, eventually. The Bear in the Big Blue House show was much better than this one, this show is just a big commercial without any real plot and the great music of Bear is sadly missed.

Time for some food, we love Sci Fi Diner. It's become a Studios tradition, and warning Miles it might be too crowded, I gave it a shot without a priority seating. Walked right up and sat down with no wait. Cool! The place wasn't 2/3 full. I think this was around 12:45 p.m. Where was everybody?

Had the same waiter we had last year, he likes to scream when Glen from the Amazing Colossal Man impales a guy with a giant hypodermic needle. Ye Gads, no nuggets on the menu!! Panic! Asked our waiter, and he said they'd be happy to make them. I think the Sci Fi must be sharing the same kitchen with the ABC Commissary next door. Just goes to show it doesn't hurt to ask if you don't see something on the menu you'd like.

We were kind of worn out, and I thought a nice quiet boat ride would be in order. We headed out and got onto a Friendship Boat to Epcot right before it pulled away. Had a good time talking to a teenage boy and his dad, they were really intrigued by our solo tent camping. It garners a certain cache, gives me an air of daring, that's about the one great thing about it, ha ha ha.

I thought Miles might nod off here, but no such luck, he was wired. We went through the International Gateway and got a stroller. Went around World Showcase greeting some characters, and then caught the bus back to Fort Wilderness. Miles wanted to stay for Illuminations, but that 4 hours away and there was no way I was going to make it that long. Too tired!

I honestly can't remember what we did from here... I think we went to camp, changed clothes, and went to the Magic Kingdom. Maybe this is the night we ate at Columbia Harbor House and saw Spectromagic? If so, where were we on Sunday night?

See, this is why you should take notes if you plan on writing a trip report.

Best thing about today: Miles telling everyone about the Indian Junk Show he was going to see
Worst thing about today: Being bone tired

Wednesday, April 16

I had made a priority seating for Breakfastosaurus before we left for this vacation, for 8:30 a.m. That was a bit too early, because we didn't get to the turnstiles until 8:30 a.m., and they held us for about 15 minutes, wouldn't let us in. Then we had to walk back as a group, I think we actually checked in about 10 minutes to 9 a.m.

I enjoy the food and atmosphere here, but the characters and service were rushed. They seemed pretty busy. I think I'll go back to our old plan of doing this breakfast at their last possible seating, instead of trying to come before the park opens.

Leaving, I tried one time to see if Miles would be up for Dinosaur! He's tall enough, but no way, too scary. The bad-guy dinosaur character was out in costume, and Miles told him all about how it's too scary in there and dinosaurs come and eat you, etc. Pretty funny.

Triceratops Spin is like the greatest ride in the whole world, right up there with Aladdin's Flying Carpets and Dumbo, whoo hoo! Around and around and around we go. No wait at all here, this area was pretty deserted, the only crowd was in Breakfastosaurus.

I got to run up to a carny game booth with no one at it at all, so I knew Miles could win a prize. He was really bummed out last year when we played $18 worth of games and won nothing, so this time I let him win and for a grand total of $24 spent during our gambling career at Disney, we walked away with a $2.50 stuffed dinosaur with tennis shoes, which Miles clutched all day and loved to pieces.

Maharajah Jungle Trek had a peacock that just put our domestic ones to shame, it was spectacular. I asked the college age Cast Member what species it was, and she was dripping with attitude, she could barely bring herself to answer me. An older gentleman CM came by right then and handed her her next assignment via the little computer printouts they use to shuffle CM's around, and she rolled her eyes and pouted off with an air of extreme martyrdom. I think she was just hung over.

Miles did some pin trading, and we went to see Flights of Wonder, another first time for us both. It was a really fun show. And they had a bird named Miles! A trumpeter hornbill. We loved the "baby" vulture routine, and the owls were soooo beautiful. I want to go next time with my money ready to hold up in the air, and get a closeup view of the hawk.

Picked up Fastpasses for the Safari and did the Pangani Trail. They have changed the naked mole rat display, I didn't have time to ask why. Must have been some health issues or social problems happening, the old multi-level tunnels they were in were just dark and empty. Poor little naked mole rats. Miles enjoyed smelling the same yucky smell over and over and laughing at the kids station. He thought he could get a stamp out of the Cast Member for every time he smelled it, ha ha ha.

The kids stations around the park are great, and the Cast Members they have staffing them must be hand picked because they work with children just brilliantly.

The Kilimanjaro Safari was unmemorable, not many elephants out, or anything else for that matter, and our mood music "African radio station" never came on in our vehicle.

Took Miles to lunch at Pizzafari, he said he wasn't hungry, so I got him to eat a Cliff Bar from my bag and I had pizza.

We had a good time looking at Pacu fish at the Tree of Life, and then I looked at the sky... hmmm... tent flaps were open, no rain fly back at camp. It was getting really muggy, and the sky was getting threatening. Starting to look a lot like summer... and that means... afternoon torrents.

By the time I told Miles we'd have to go now, and the time I got up to the Resort Phones at the front of the park, I'd made up my mind. I was getting out of Fort Wilderness.

It wasn't really a rational, concious thing. Some shred of self-preservation just reared up in me and dialed the internal Reservations number from the free phone. Some spirit of self-love spoke through me, saying "Do you have anything left at one of the Moderates for tonight and tomorrow night?" How about Port Orleans, French Quarter? "Miles, would you like to stay at a hotel with a pool with a dragon slide instead of the tent tonight?" Boy would he! No discounts. No AP rates. $165 a night plus tax... that's what I paid to stay in an Animal Kingdom Lodge Savannah room last year. Yikes!

I told her I would be checking out of Fort Wilderness, it being around 2:30 p.m. at this point, I figured I'd bought myself two resorts that day, but no... she put me on hold for a few minutes and came back saying they would be happy to transfer my reservation for tonight and credit me at Port Orleans with what I'd already paid for tonight at Fort Wilderness, just go back to camp and pack up and check out at the desk so they know you've vacated the campsite, and go check into Port Orleans. Wow, what a nice thing to do don't you think, readers? Of course, I'd told her the whole "oh my God I can't spend another night in the tent get me out" story. Not a tragedy compared to world events, but it must have stirred some sympathy in her. She got *a lot* of thank you's and gratitude from the heart from me.

Let's go Miles, we're striking camp and going to the Dragon Slide. Can I get a *real* yahoo!?

It took me like 14 minutes to strike camp, I think it may have been a record for abandoning a campsite. It reminded me of the old M.A.S.H. reruns where they'd have to bug out when the front line was advancing on them. Go go go!

Checked out at the front desk at Fort Wilderness, and standing right next to me was a guy with a boy scout group, explaining that the parts to fix their bus to go home wouldn't be in for two days, and trying to find a place or a way for them to not have to vacate their campsites. So, I know at least my site probably got filled that night! The campground was totally full, and there was a long line of people with popups checking in.

Port Orleans French Quarter was a bit on the deserted side, and we breezed through check in and up to our kind of shabby room. The blinds were bent in one spot, the rug had a stain on it and was a little threadbare in places, but you know... I have never been so happy to see airconditioning and walls in my life.

And wonder of wonders, a bathroom, my very own private bathroom, not ten steps away, an I-can-pee-without-packing-for-the-Iditerod bathroom, an I-can-shower-without-losing-track-of-Miles bathroom, with a real I-can-put-Miles-in-the-tub-with-toys-and-get-a-BREAK-for-20-minutes bathtub. Wonderful.

We donned our suits and made a priority seating for Boatwright's at the old Dixie Landings down the road, and went for a swim.

I had brought Miles' own little life vest, though they had some there at the pool. The resort lobby looked deserted because everyone was in the pool! It was hopping! We had a great time going down the slide together a couple dozen times until I just didn't want to climb the stairs anymore.

Had to get out to make it to Boatwrights, it was hard to get Miles out of the water.

Took the ferry down to Boatwrights. There were a lot of people trying to go the other way to Downtown Disney, who were getting faced with totally full ferries with not a spot left on them, and getting really frustrated. Our skipper called in and confirmed they were just putting some extra boats on and sure enough before we pulled away an empty boat showed up and got everyone waiting on board.

Dinner at Boatwright's was surprisingly REALLY good, though the kitchen seemed pretty slow. Our waiter was totally sweet. I had a big ol' steak, it was great, the bread was incredibly delicious, and Miles really enjoyed whatever he had. I think it was... chicken strips? Does that sound familiar?

We walked back to Port Orleans and decided to go to Epcot for Illuminations. I decided to drive, so Miles could fall asleep in the van if he wanted to, on the way back to our resort tonight.

Upon entering the park, Miles asked to ride Spaceship Earth again. As we approached the loading area, he grabbed my hand and told me "Mommy, it says 'Please take small children by the hand'", gawrsh that was cute.

It was just about time for Illuminations to start. They were very crowded in here tonight, we got a kind of crappy spot at the last minute, but I was able to put Miles up on my shoulders. I just love the music, I could hear it over and over again.

Being at the front was good for a quick exit, though there really were THRONGS of people tonight. Got into our van and out, and the traffic was pretty backed up out on the roads, maybe from people leaving the Studios or the Magic Kingdom.

Sure enough, Miles went out about 3 minutes into the ride, and I carried him up to the room and tucked him in. Ahh, what a nice soft bed and a t.v. to channel surf before going to sleep. I could even drink water safely like I usually do, knowing it wouldn't be an ordeal to try and pee in the morning. Life is good.

Best thing about today: Getting credited for Ft. Wilderness by a very friendly and sweet reservationist and the Dragon Slide and my steak and fresh bread at Boatwrights - it's a toss up between all three!

Worst thing about today: Coming up late for Illuminations, should have got a spot at the rail instead of seeing Spaceship Earth, and had a bit of a sit-down.

Thursday, April 17

Got up early, I guess we were conditioned to do it by this point. My original plan had us leaving WDW in the early evening today, and staying in a motel south of Tallahassee, but I had nixed that in favor of staying here another night and doing the full drive home tomorrow.

We could catch another Extra Magic Hour at the Magic Kingdom today, and that turned out to be a really good move, because by 11 a.m. today, if you were just getting into Orlando, you were looking at 45 minute waits for It's a Small World and 90 minute waits for Peter Pan. Lord only knows what the standby wait for Winnie the Pooh was, we did it once this morning and could never get back on.

We got off the bus about 7:55 a.m., and Miles skipped and ran and fell right down on the pavement and scraped his knee up good. Some tears and blood, and I told him I'd get him a stroller for today, so he could ride instead of walk, and we'd go get him a bandaid.

He was patient #1 for the day at First Aid. A very gentle, very sweet man patched him up and gave me some more antibiotic ointment and high quality butterfly bandages for later, and gave Miles a couple of stickers, then let him pick a pin from a lanyard. Miles forgot all about his knee, though I bet the numbing agent in the ointment had some effect, too.

We walked up through Fantasyland, and on a whim, I stopped at the hostess desk for Cinderella's Royal Table, and got a priority seating for lunch at 11:30 a.m. I did hear someone right before me ask about today's breakfast, and that was a "no". So, lunch it would be. (Later, when we checked in at 11:20, I heard the staff saying they were booked solid for all their lunch and dinner seatings for the rest of the day.)

We made our rounds of Fantasyland, doing just about everything we wanted to do in 90 minutes, then lo and behold, Miles says he wants to do Splash Mountain and Big Thunder Mountain Railroad.

Walked us over to Frontierland and got the cast member with the height stick in front of Big Thunder Mountain to verify Miles was tall enough, yes, he was, said the smiling cast member, after measuring him carefully, so I picked up Fastpasses for Big Thunder Mountain for later and entered the standby line for Splash which only said 25 minutes.

After about 10 minutes in that line, we wound our way up to a handsome, tall young man with a height measuring stick. No, I'm sorry, ma'am but he's just not making it. But the cast member in front of Big Thunder Mountain just measured him and his head was totally over that line. Well, ma'am some cast members just wave kids through when they shouldn't. I saw it with my own eyes, he was taller than the stick. He's not tall enough on this stick. Maybe there's something different with your pavement? No, it's all the same. Can you tell me how he can be 41 1/2" on his growth chart at home, tall enough at the next attraction, but not tall enough here? I'm sorry but I just can't let you on. You know, two months ago his pediatrician measured him at 41 1/2". Well maybe you need to get a new doctor. The conversation went something like that, but I think the snotty tone and me flipping out at the rudeness don't quite come across in print. I could add stuff about flaring nostrils and arms waving and chins pointing up in the air, but, you know, you've seen people get into before in your life, I'm sure. No, no cursing and no threats of violence, but it wasn't a love scene.

I walked back to the gift shop/photo area and asked the girl behind the counter if there was a manager around. I told her my story a little, when she asked me to tell her what was up, and then she went to call the Frontierland manager, who apparently floats around the area. After about 10 minutes, he came and said "The cast member said *what* to you??" I was like, Mama don't whip little Beauford, he's just doing what he thinks is right and we were both getting upset. Really, I didn't want to get the guy in trouble, I wanted to save kids from having to go through this b.s. over and over again.

My whole point is that this measuring thing needs to be standardized and not so freaking subjective. Telling someone this was the whole reason I pushed the issue, not really to get Miles onto the ride. I mean, that was the outcome, but I've heard horror stories like this from other guests, reporting their trips on the internet, and it's just really crummy guest policy and I think people need to fuss a little and let the management know it's crummy.

I told the manager, I mean, what if we weren't talking about turning away little kids inconsistantly from rides they'd stood in line for... what if instead it was adults? Would it be so subjective? Think about that for a second. No way! They couldn't take the heat for one minute if it was grownups they were telling one thing and then another from ride to ride.

Here's a solution: Let's say for the sake of a black and white argument that it's really true if you're just a fraction of a centimeter under 40" and you try to ride Splash Mountain, you're definitely going to fly out of the log and die. OK, then good guest policy says you make the requirement 42", and then if a child is even a full inch under that, the cast member says, "Well, you sure are getting to big a big boy, I think you're just tall enough! Congratulations!" and everyone has a Disney Day, and no one flies out of the log and dies. Trust me, it's a really good idea and it's not that way now because someone in the management over there is just mean and authoritarian. When I am queen of Frontierland, things will be very different. You may now discuss amongst yourselves, and if you are reading this at rec.arts.disney.parks I'll come check back at around post #56 in the thread just to see who's around at that point, yelling insults at eachother about grammer and questioning eachother's popularity or educational background. If you're reading this on a moderated board, really, you should be fairly free of any further comments on this topic that aren't sweet and positive.

Anyways, back in the real world, the manager got a measuring stick and, warning me that his decision was final, he had Miles stand still on flat cement and held it up to him. Miles scrunched down so he wouldn't hit his head on the wood thing coming at his face. Miles, stand up straight, buddy. Miles stood on his toes. Miles, put your feet flat on the ground honey and just stand normally. The manager then put the stick *behind* him, and swiveled the bar up to the *back* of his head so he couldn't see it coming, and lo and behold, my son is indeed about 41 1/2" tall.

Boy, was the manager pissed. Like seething. Like grim death. Not at me... at Beauford. He wasn't gonna whip him, he was gonna shoot him instead, I could tell. I said again, "Don't get him in too much trouble, ok, it's not his fault there's no consistant and objective way to measure kids." "I'll take care of it," he replied, sounding kind of like Dirty Harry. Yikes!

I did ask him, on our way to the ride's exit, where we would be seated in the next available log, about the rumor I'd heard re. Disneyland trying a system where they bounced a beam off your head and gave you a wristband. We tried that here, he said, and people just traded wrist bands.

So, we rode Splash Mountain, and it wasn't much fun, but we didn't get wet because we sat in the way back seat, and I have my first "customer complaint" story to tell out of over 10 trips to Disney World.

We had a wonderful lunch at Cinderella's Castle to make up for it. First, approaching the back of the castle, we look up, and who's up there waving to the crowd, but the resident Princess herself, and her Fairy Godmother. After a minute of bowing and waving back, we checked in and were allowed into the Audience Hall or whatever they call it, I can't remember. I didn't expect it to be so perfectly detailed like... a castle! Well, duh. What was I expecting? I guess chrome? The room was totally complete, with tapestries, coats of arms, a big stone fireplace, suits of armor, stained glass windows, and thrones in gilt and red velvet for us to sit on. Very cute.

We were seated after about 10 minutes, upstairs at a table for two right at the beautifully done lead glass windows, along the balcony, overlooking the carousel, and getting another view of Cinderella and her Godmother waving to the crowds below not ten feet away.

Our waitress was surprisingly disheveled and brusque, kind of an incongruous look for a castle, maybe she was going for a wench impression? She was efficient, though, and when the kitchen got Miles' order wrong she complained loudly about them on our behalf, to us. LOL The food was decent, and the prices weren't bad. The salad was actually good -- I would skip on the chicken pasta dish if I went again, it reminded me too much of Lean Cuisine. I just couldn't bring myself to order their signature dish of commercial red meat stuffed into hydrogenated lard puff pastry, ai yai yai. I'm sure it tasted good, lots of other people around me were chowing down.

About halfway through our meal, Miles wasn't even looking, but I saw Captain Hook run right by our windows! Miles, look, I just saw Captain Hook! I don't think he believed me, but while he was looking, here comes Peter Pan, running by in the opposite direction! They chased eachother around the castle balcony a couple times, stopping in front of our windows for a little jousting, even. Soooo great, what a neat surprise!

After our meal, we hit the royal potties and they were... just potties. I think they should theme them with gilt and red velvet and golden toilet seats. I mean, a "throne", they are missing a chance here at a great joke.

Went to exit, and who is in the audience hall, with only four other people down there, but Cinderella. Man oh man this lunch was turning into an *experience*. Cinderella told Miles that she had just caught Tinkerbell flying around the castle, and had her in her hands. Would he like to see her? Carefully, Cinderella opened her hands and whoosh!! A shiny red light bolted out and flew a bit around the walls, and then whoosh, up the chimney she disappeared. "Oh, I guess she went up the chimney!" said Cinderella. I won't tell you how it was done, but I saw. ;-)

We missed the sword in the stone show, have to do it next visit. We went over to Belle's Storytime, which has been on my list of things to do for the first time for the last three trips, and finally, here we were. We waited for about 15 minutes as a very sizeable crowd grew, and then right at the moment Belle was supposed to appear, an announcement came on that she couldn't make it and was sorry. Jeez, they didn't know that until the moment the show was supposed to start? I hope the cast member was ok, it was kind of weird. A guy next to me said, "Maybe she broke a nail." LOL

Miles had decided not to ride Big Thunder Mountain after all, so we did Jungle Cruise. I was able to give the now-almost-current Big Thunder Mountain Railroad Fastpasses to a British couple behind us in the Jungle Cruise queue, which absolutely thrilled them. They said they hadn't known much about this place (Disney World) before they came, and it was really crowded, and it was sort of more a kiddie park, yes? There weren't many roller coasters? They had been in line for a while for Jungle Cruise, and asked me what it was as we were about to board... well, you go around on a track in a little boat, and fake animals look like they might squirt water on you, and the skipper makes lots of puns. It was a funny conversation. We saw them later about an hour later, and they thanked me again, said they had been able to make it onto Big Thunder Mountain and Splash Mountain, and were on their way to Space Mountain to get Fastpasses. They were going back to Universal the next day, though. Different strokes for different folks!

Not sure what we did after that, but I do know we ended up back at our pool and our Dragon Slide around 3 p.m. I called while we were changing in the room for a priority seating for the Fantasmic Dinner Package, they did indeed have a time for us at 4:45 p.m. at Mama Melrose. I had to pay in advance in full with my credit card. The girl told me to pick up my vouchers at the front desk at my resort, or at guest services at the Studios.

Didn't leave us much time to swim, but we got a few trips down the slide accomplished, and then I hurried us into some clothes and over to the lobby to pick up our Dinner Package tickets. I wanted to drive tonight, so we wouldn't have to deal with the post-Fantasmic! bus crowds. I pulled up in front of the resort, and prepared to run in for the tickets, but was told I couldn't leave my van there without a person inside it. Ok, whatever. So I parked in the lot nearby and walked to the lobby, and the guest services cast member said, no, you don't get your Dinner Package tickets here, you get your voucher at the restaurant when you check in. Really? Can you check that, please? She did, and confirmed it, with Mama Melrose itself. Yes, you just show up at the hostess stand and they give it to you there. Okilie dokilie.

Mama Melrose was fairly crowded, but we were seated right away. Our waiter was laughably incompetant. At one point, he actually stuck his finger right in my food, serving my bowl of risotto. He was slow, and had a beleagured air about him. He was really reluctant to even ask the kitchen if they could make a grilled cheese sandwich for Miles, I mean, say yes, say no, but don't agonize like you're manipulating me to say "never mind". Maybe he'd been sticking his fingers in the food in the kitchen, too, and wasn't popular back there. Anyways, I ate around the spot he'd touched, and Miles got a grilled cheese, and my mushroom risotto wasn't very good, too bitter, and my tiramisu was disappointing, I think it was from frozen, or at least the lady fingers were for sure, but... I love this restaurant. I mean, I really, really love it. I can't wait to go back.

Why? What madness is this?

Well, for one thing, the waiter was a strange exception to the rule. Every other waitress and waiter in there looked really professional and was hustling. The one time I'd eaten here before, as part of a backstage tour, our servers were incredibly friendly. I'm willing to give the place another chance on that count.

For another, the theming is great. I love the decor, the rustic furniture and casual family restaurant atmosphere.

And finally, the flatbread. Oh good golly the flatbread! I've had a few different kinds, on that aforementioned backstage tour, and this time I got the Grilled Pepperoni with Roasted Peppers and slobber slobber slobber man that was good.

I like not having to wait to sit down at Fantasmic, especially with a little kid, but Miles is getting old enough to handle a big wait if he really wants to see that show again. The problem with the Dinner Package is that it's way more food than I'd ever order. The prices aren't jacked up past the average cost from the menu, but the overall effect is that I spend way more on dinner than I normally would. I don't think I'll do the Package again, unless I've fasted for the whole day prior and I'm really ready to put on the feedbag. Just an appetizer flatbread and a side salad was plenty plenty plenty food for me.

We had some time to kill before Fantasmic! so we did another first for any trip here, we finally made it to the Honey I Shrunk the Audience playground. It was pretty crowded in there, and hard to keep track of Miles, but he was old enough now to handle getting a little lost from me, and really the whole thing is well contained. His comment on leaving - "That was the most amazing playground in the whole world!" The college aged cast member watching the exit said to him, "Hey, I think so, too!" We can't wait to come back here and play more when it's less crowded.

Time for Fantasmic! We were about half an hour before start time, and were able to get a seat pretty close down to the front, maybe five or six rows up from the rail. That turned out to make a difference for both of us, I think, in the emotional impact of the show.

Before the show started, I asked the folks around us, if we left a couple of little toys that had been in my bag on the seats, if they could please help the toys save our seats while we went to get some popcorn. You have to leave the roped off Fantasmic Dinner Package area to get to the snack stands, and then when you try and get back in, the cast member you said "I'm going out for popcorn" to is supposed to remember you. Totally impossible for the cast member. Unlike Beauford's solution, which would have been to deny us reentry until I called a manager, this lady was just waving everyone in. Still a management problem.

Going back through the bleachers, and there's a popcorn vendor walking back and forth right by our seats. Doh! The toys did a good job of saving our seats, by the way.

The folks behind us said, in a British accent, "Would you like our popcorn, we can't eat it, it's all full of salt!" Poor things, they had no idea we do salt here instead of their customary sugar and they were really grossed out. The stuff was atomically salty.

The show was fine, I really dig the barges at the end, it's hard not to get emotional, it's so over the top. The plot for this show, however, is totally inscrutable. I defy anyone to tell me the story of Fantasmic in a way that hangs together in a narrative fashion. It's more like watching Mickey channel surf through the Disney unconcious.

We waited a while for the crowd to clear, and got to hear about 40 loud booming choruses of "Do not walk on the bleachers. Do not walk on the bleachers, use the stairs." I can't imagine how many times a week they have someone hurting themselves pretty badly falling trying to get out by walking on the bleachers. I bet they have a couple fractures a year. I wonder if the settlements and doctor bills have equaled the price of putting in seats with backs, yet.

The sky had been looking like it was going to pour before the show, but it didn't, but the folks for show #2 were out of luck, because not ninety seconds after we were both buckled into our van, it really let loose, with that kind of flash flood warning rain that's more like a waterfall than a rain shower.

I bundled my now-sleeping Miles in my rain poncho and ran back to our room. I had to wake him up a little to change his clothes -- even with the poncho we both got damp. Our last night. Sweet dreams!

Best thing today: What a day! Had to be all the characters at lunch showing up unexpected but I'm tempted to say the Grilled Pepperoni Flatbread.

Worst thing today: Experiencing first-hand the non-functional kid-measuring system at the Magic Kingdom

Friday, April 18

Oh well, the trip is over. I have a hard time leaving, I really really do. No matter how exhausted I get during the trip, I still don't want to leave, ever.

We had breakfast at the Port Orleans food court, it wasn't very good. In fact, Miles didn't want to eat his biscuits and gravy at all, the gravy was made kind of funky. We loaded up the van, and said bye bye to our resort.

I had two admissions to a water park left on some old Hoppers, so we parked out in front of Typhoon Lagoon and were some of the first people in line for the day. We had to wait about 15 minutes for them to open the park, and by the way, there was a young family who was *first* in line, and were asked if they'd like to come in and "officially" open the park for the day. That looked like fun!

Miles and I did the family raft ride, he went down the slide by the quiet end of the wave pool, we did the lazy river twice, and Miles played for about half an hour in Ketchakiddie Creek, and then we had to go, so I could make it home before my bedtime.

Boo hoo! Boo hoo! Called hubby on the cell phone to let him know we were on the road, and we didn't stop again until Gainesville.

By the way, don't make my mistake and try and stop at Gainesville, keep going and do a more rural exit for gas and food. The traffic was horrendous, and we wasted almost 30 extra minutes here just getting from the interstate to the ATM machine to McDonald's and back on the interstate. If I'd waited for a one-stop service center in a rural or suburban area, I'd have been able to do all that in a third of the time, and all in one spot.

We stopped again at Cracker Barrell, this time in Mobile, for dinner, and were home by 10:00 p.m. I just found the Winnie the Pooh pin Miles purchased yesterday, and I still haven't finished unpacking my suitcase from all the warmer things we brought for the first few chilly evenings at Fort Wilderness. Won't need them again here until late October, but I keep promising myself I'll put the suitcase away, as the cat is sleeping on it now and it's getting hairy.

Best thing about today: The souvenir photo I bought of Miles on the lazy river, where his eyes and the water and the sky are all about the same color

Worst thing about today: Having to leave

Three Things I Forgot & Three Things I Noticed

Because I didn't take notes, some of the days got jumbled up. I know the following things happened, but it was only after I finished this whole report that I began to remember which days they may have occured on. So here's three more gems from memory lane for you!

I Forgot to Mention: Seeing Bruce aka Zazu of rec.arts.disney.parks working the Frontierland platform, as Miles and I rode around the whole park, trying to get Miles to doze off, which didn't work. It was very crowded and I didn't have a chance to say hi to him. But later that evening, as we were leaving the park for the day, we did indeed meet up face to face at the Main Street platform, which was cool. He told me, since we were leaving about 20 minutes before the fireworks (too tired to stay any longer), if we were leaving via the TTC, to take the big ferry and then step off to the left when we docked -- there is a viewing area on the Seven Seas Lagoon where you get a nice view of the fireworks and castle, and they pipe the music in for you to hear. I did, and then submitted this info to the great folks over at Passporter, and they sent me a free Passporter and a water bottle strap today, after including this tip in their newsletter. Bruce, I owe you half a Passporter. ;-)

I Forgot to Mention: Getting Miles a hair cut at the Main Street barber shop, where the lady made his hair stand straight up in the air , like a real cool kid, putting blue gel all in it and glitter, which he actually hated becuase it kept sticking him and bugging him., but he loved the blue gel. Overall, it was a great experience and one we'll repeat, though there was a pretty long wait, and the guy in front of us had absolutely no sense of humor and his son was a little odd to Miles. "Plays well with others" didn't seem to describe either of them, so it was a bit stressful being stuck in a tiny waiting area with them for almost half an hour. But all's well that ends well, and Miles looked really great coming out of there!

I Forgot to Mention: Getting stuck on Goofy's Barstormer, right at the end of the ride. The other train stuck on the tracks was stuck at the first hill, going up, and they were up there tilted backwards for at least 15 minutes. The engineers all showed up looking tense and fooling around with boxes of controls right below our train. They were able to back the train in front of us into the loading area, then move it forward out of the way and pull our train in. Miles' and my lap bar wouldn't open, they had to come release it manually. I tried to crack a joke with the people waiting right there in the queue, but I'm afraid I couldn't find anyone who wasn't too busy fuming to chat. They closed the attraction after we got off, so maybe we had the last ride of the day.

Now three things I noticed. Sort of personal musings, if you will.

I noticed: The Chinese Silk Music performer at Epcot did and said and played the exact same thing from one show to the next. She does the same thing five times a day, year after year after year? Can't be, but I imagined that she kind of looked like she hated the audience. It struck me as extremely odd, that there was no variation in her speech, or one note of her playing. I am also skeptical that the kids doing the acrobatic acts are truly having a wonderful experience where all their educational needs are being taken care of, etc. like the announcement says when they come out to perform. Maybe I'm being paranoid.

I noticed: I really missed my husband when I needed to shower or pee alone at Fort Wilderness, when the whole Beauford thing went down at Splash Mountain, and when Miles made a wish at Cinderella's Fountain for Daddy to come to Disney World with us next time. He got a phone call on my cell phone right then and there, after that one! As it stands right now, Daddy is indeed scheduled to accompany us on our next trip, though he is madly looking for a new job that will preclude his being able to come, I think avoiding Disney World might be his #1 motivation in life now.

I noticed: The extended hours and extra parades and characters and shows on this trip made me want to return during a holiday week. Depending on how our finances go this Fall, I may add the day before Thanksgiving through Thanksgiving weekend to our December trip, to take advantage of the perks like Carousel of Progress and fireworks every night.

Well, so long folks.

Amanda Parr