Hello!

My 20 month old tends to get "nervous" when surrounded by a lot of strangers. She wimpers and holds me tight. Especially when accompanied by a lot of noise and surprises. I feel aweful for her and we are working with her to get more exposure to social situations.

Does your toddler have any of the same insecurities? Have you taken him/her to a Disney park? What's been your experience? Did his/her condition improve or worsen? Or, do you have any advice for us?

I'm hoping for a big dose of Disney magic the moment we walk through those gates!:(

Thank you!

Our dd was like this off and on (now almost 4). We have pictures of her 2 years ago when we last went to DLR clinging on to us for dear life while getting a couple pictures with Pooh and friends! We are going back next month and she is still a bit apprehensive, but excited to see the princesses. When asked if she wants to go she usually says "when I'm big like Rachel" (her sister who is 7). So when we wake them up next month to surprise them I'm a little concerned she might say "but I'm not big yet!" LOL Overall she seems excited at the thought of going though. Maybe show your little one lots of videos from DLR. Do you have the free DLR planning DVD? Also, we loved to watch the Disneyland Sing-Along-Songs video- very cute with lots of characters from the park. Good luck!
BTW, I live in Portage, MI now, but grew up at 13 and Greenfield. I worked at Beaumont RO for about 6 years. Did you grow up in RO?

I don't have any suggestions other than just take your time, and go at her pace. Enjoy yourself.

I don't have any suggestions other than just take your time, and go at her pace. Enjoy yourself.

Excellent advice. As an adult with anxiety, I find a healthy dose of Ativan helps me when I go to Disneyland. How sad is it that I love Disneyland, but need a drug to help me cope when I'm there.

That's not sad, Rhiannon, that's doing what you need to do in order stay healthy enough to enjoy yourself. Nothing wrong with that.

To the original poster, just take your time. Even if she doesn't want to to characters this trip, so what? There will be trips where she's older and more confident where she probably will want to. The point is to have as good a time as possible, and a large part of that has to be tailoring the trip to your child; if that means that all you guys do is ride the train around the park all day, so what? If that's what makes her (and you) happy, then isn't that the point of going to Disneyland anyway? :)

Carrying her in a sling will keep her close to you, and keep you hands free (and is a lot easier than carrying all of her weight without support). Earplugs are a lifesaver for the loud sudden noises at Disneyland... everything is so high volume there. My son wore them for fireworks, a lot of the shows and even some of the rides and he loved them, he would actually ask for them when he knew he was going to need them. Try to get some down time in quiet areas in between the highly stimulating areas so she can get some relief during her day.

All of your advice is so wonderful!! You've put my mind at ease. I especially love to hear that if she wants to ride the train all day - I'm game for that. And we will go at her pace. I have a feeling that we will need to take her back to the room at some (or several) point in the trip and read books for a while. I've come to terms with that too. I will not let my psycho love for Disney corrupt my natural momming skills. There's always next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, and when the kids are old enough to want to ditch us and ride Space Mountain all day, we'll miss these times.
We are borrowing a friend's baby backpack that hubby will have to wear because I'm 6 months pregnant - come to think of it, it may actually balance me out a bit if I wore it. Hmmmm

At any rate, it's just good to know that there will be other kids there crying at Mickey and burying their heads in their mom's shirts. Thanks again!

My son was really shy at meeting characters at first, too. When we would approach a character, I would pick him up so he could be face to face with the character (its intimidating that they are tall and hovering over the child...). Then, I would say to the character, "OH, hi, Pluto - this is my son, Josh. I don't think you've ever met him before. He's a little shy."

I find this clues in the character and then they are a little more cautious about scaring your kid, too. Like, Pluto made silly faces from a distance and then put his paw up for a high-five, rather than running in for a hug. It worked and my son now LOVES the characters.

If your daughter is nervous around the characters, my advice is simple. Don't worry about it! Pictures with the characters is only a SMALL part of the fun to be had at DLR. And the big thing I learned with my daughter is sometimes it was just more fun to get in the pictures with her!

The other thing I noticed too - you hinted at it in your post - the magic of Disney has a way of surprising us.

Go and relax and remember to view the entire time through your daughter's eyes. Pay attention to what makes her smile and I guarantee you will have memories that will last a lifetime ....

If your daughter is nervous around the characters, my advice is simple. Don't worry about it! Pictures with the characters is only a SMALL part of the fun to be had at DLR. And the big thing I learned with my daughter is sometimes it was just more fun to get in the pictures with her!

The other thing I noticed too - you hinted at it in your post - the magic of Disney has a way of surprising us.

Go and relax and remember to view the entire time through your daughter's eyes. Pay attention to what makes her smile and I guarantee you will have memories that will last a lifetime ....Thank you - this is so sweet - call us crazy, but I do belive there is an element of "magic" that can be helpful in these situations. I won't even attempt to get a pic with characters. If the doctor scares her, then a 6 foot mouse in a tuxedo will probably scare her too.

You don't have to go back to the motel for quiet time, there are several spots in the park that are soothing. I recommend downstairs from the Hungry Bear restaurant, close to the water. It's quiet, sheltered, and she'll enjoy watching the ducks.

Have a great trip!

ETA: in a lot of around-town situations, people are probably focused on her becuase she's so adorable. At the park, most strangers will have their attention elsewhere and that may make her more comfortable.

ETA: in a lot of around-town situations, people are probably focused on her becuase she's so adorable. At the park, most strangers will have their attention elsewhere and that may make her more comfortable.As I just change my avatar, I hear she is adorable. Thanks for saying that! She does get a lot of attention. This gives me hope, thank you!

I won't even attempt to get a pic with characters. If the doctor scares her, then a 6 foot mouse in a tuxedo will probably scare her too.

I'd actually give you advice to at least make the attempt. If I've learned anything from my two kids (ages 4 and 1) it's that they will surprise you.

When you see a character on the street walk up there (hold your daughter in your arms or get down to her level) and ask her if she wants her picture taken. Let the child decide. If she doesn't want to no big deal - maybe just a wave and keep moving on - sometimes my daughter just wanted to stand and watch the character interact with the other children. This helped her to understand that the character was friendly with other kids her age as well.

Another pice of advice I would give is the autograph books. At first Iwas very reluctant to buy one and didn't really see much sense in them. However, with my daughter I discovered the books were a great way to "break the ice" with the characters as well.

The last piece of advice I would give you is to pick up a Disneyland nametag for your daughter. I made a post about it today. These things have their own special magic power.

Oh yeah and don't be afraid to become a big kid yourself and do things with her as tho you were her best friend - not necessarily her parent. If it helps get a nametag for yourself as well. Treat the autograph book as something for BOTH of you - so you can BOTH go up and get the autographs. And remember to try and stay at her level or bring her up to yours around the characters - don't let her stay around your knees. If she is up and head level with everyone else it can help to alleviate some of the anxiety of being "lost in a forest of legs".

Oh yeah and don't be afraid to become a big kid yourself and do things with her as tho you were her best friend - not necessarily her parent.

And proof that I follow my own advice ...
http://www.dropshots.com/photos/77977/20050516/143938.jpg

"Driving" around Disneyland ...
http://www.dropshots.com/photos/77977/20051020/095058.jpg

And proof that I follow my own advice ...

"Driving" around Disneyland ...
Totally cute! I'm no stranger to acting like a kid at the parks. Just ask my husband who is usually pretending not to know me. :cool: