What are your thoughts? Every year we invite a friend to Disneyland with us, thinking Hey, it can only be MORE fun for Delaware to have someone her own age to play with and every year, from everyone, we get the same response: But WE wanted to be the ones who took so-and-so for their first trip. Ok, I can understand that...so why the heck-a-rooni don't you take them already? LOL I mean, this is year 3 of our annual trips and peeps are still lagging. I don't get it. So this year we invited a friend of ours' daughter, Kaitlyn. Her parents deliberated a month or so and came back with a YES (WooHoo!!) but Kaitlyn herself said no, cos it would be too long away from her parents. Ok, I can dig that. Totally understandable. So we invited my cousins daughter (our definite first choice any way!) on 8/27 and she was all for it. I snail-mailed them an official invite from us last week and then called her today to see what their thinking on it was, and she says she is all for it, but wants to talk to her hubby cos he is pitching a mini-fit about wanting to be the one who takes Zoey for her first trip. Cousin says thats all good and great, but they won't be able to go for 2-3 years and that seems kind of selfish to deny her a trip for just that reason, so she is going to work on him and let me know October 1st. My question is, would you let YOUR kid go with someone else for their first trip to DL? I am a compulsive photo-taker so no experience would go un-documented and a slight scrapbook nut, so they would have all the great stuff with none of the negative (however small they may be!) experiences (grumpy kids with tired feet, crowded parks, kids too scared to go on ANYTHING, etc.).

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but my personal opinion is that a trip to Disneyland really is an important family bonding experience for many people and it is definitely the parents' prerogative to accompany their child on his/her first visit. There is no rule with regards to what age is the right one for that first visit and I see nothing at all wrong with parents deciding that their child should wait until the family trip is practical even if there is an opportunity for the child to go with someone else.

Think about it from your own perspective for a moment. Would you have allowed someone else to take your child to Disneyland for the first time, even if it wouldn't have been practical to take him/her yourself for a few years?

-Jeff

I am a single mom of three, who finally got to take my kids to Disneyland last week. Yes, it was incredibly special and I am grateful that I got to be the one to take them. It would totally suck to miss out on it. However, if someone I knew and trusted had offered to take one of them before planning a trip would be feasible for our family, I like to think that I would have let them go. (For us a much bigger issue would have been how to let only one child go and leave two siblings behind).

None of us knows for absolute certain what our circumstances will be in a "couple of years". I wouldn't deny my child the experience. JMO.

My mom let me go with a friend's family the first time I went and although it would have been special to share that first trip with her, I will always have the special memory of her letting me go although it must have been tough. It was still every bit as special when I took HER a few years later.

Thats my opinion also. Guess I am just bummed because we have made SUCH a big deal out of taking a friend this year for Del, and she is so excited and now it may not happen. Drama, drama, drama. Don't think for a minute that I don't understand their side of it, cos o-boy I do. Just trying to maybe get some ideas that I hadn't thought of to "sway the odds". LOL I have every belief that Zoey will be going with us, I know her mom and she is every bit as stubborn as me.

I dont think I can honestly answer that question. We took both our kids before they turned 2. I wouldnt have let my kids travel any where with out me or daddy at that age. LOL They are now 3 and 7. I still cant think of many people I would allow them to travel with.

As a side note- why do people always say "I don't know why you are taking them so young, they wont remember it". Is the memory the only reason worth going? We are in the moment people. We want to have fun NOW. Doesnt matter what the kids remember. There will be plenty to remember later in life.

As a side note- why do people always say "I don't know why you are taking them so young, they wont remember it". Is the memory the only reason worth going? We are in the moment people. We want to have fun NOW. Doesnt matter what the kids remember. There will be plenty to remember later in life.Emma (now almost 4) went to Disneyland when she was 8 weeks old. She may not have memories of it but I always will. She loved christmas lights of Small World Holiday. The thing I remember best was when the Jungle Cruise broke down and the CM's had to transfer her to the other boat. They were sweating. She likes to look at the pictures and pretend she remembers.

We have a nice big family across the street from us with 10 kids(5 hers, 4 his and 1 theirs) :eek: ...........My wife and I only have 1 child. There is no way they are taking those kids to Disneyland(they are worried more about basic things like health ins and food)

When we offered to take one with us a couple of years ago there was no hesitation in saying yes and thankyou :)

Thats my opinion also. Guess I am just bummed because we have made SUCH a big deal out of taking a friend this year for Del, and she is so excited and now it may not happen. Drama, drama, drama. Don't think for a minute that I don't understand their side of it, cos o-boy I do. Just trying to maybe get some ideas that I hadn't thought of to "sway the odds".

Instead of trying to pressure another family to let you take their kid on a trip that they would prefer to reserve for themselves, I believe you should use this opportunity to teach your child a lesson in the importance of family. Simply explain to her that Disneyland is a place for families to spend time together and that her friends will be visiting the park with their own families, just as your child will be enjoying the opportunity to share the park with her family.

Certainly, if a child's parents does not consider a trip to Disneyland to be all that important a family-bonding experience, and those parents are comfortable enough with you to trust their child to your care, offering to take their child to the park is a very nice thing to do. If it is an experience that the parents wish to reserve for themselves, though, you absolutely should remain respectful of that.

-Jeff

My daughter is an only child. We have taken her friends and cousins with us on quite a few trips. We took a friend of hers to Maui with us for 2 weeks. Her parents and two other siblings had not been there. It was a great trip and we took many photo's. In fact it was her birthday when we were there, nad we went to a great dinner that night, had a little party back at the hotel, with a cake, gifts and all that. She still thanks us for that trip whenever I see her.
I have taken my niece to Disneyland about 3 times with us. I have taken my daughter's friends with us a few times also. Once it was a friends first trip to Disneyland. I showed her a great time, Blue Bayou and all.
Some parents are weird about this stuff though. I think sometimes they want ot be the person to do it, but lag on doing it at the same time. It's not that important ot them, or they'd do it. I'm thinking of my daughter's twin friends in particular. THey have never been to a concert, and the Dad won't let them go with us to one because he wants to be the first one to take them. OK, then do it. Concerts come and go, we go, they don't. I just think that he doesn't want to see that particular group or singer. So the kids sit home. Upset. Knowing they could have went. To me, it's selfish.
Kids need to be able to know they can be away from the parents and all is OK in the world. I'm talking people you can trust with your kids here. Make no mistake, there are more I wouldn't let my child go with than would, but you get the idea.

Jeff, I couldn't agree more! We almost took Zoey on our first trip when her and Delaney were 3, her parents agreed to it but we got our communication all mixed up and I didn't know they had agreed until after the trip. Let me say YET AGAIN that I understand completely wanting to experience your childs first trip to DL and would never think to pressure someone on that. Just saying if the childs mom is into it, what can I do to help HER strengthen HER case? LOL :D
And of course they trust me to take their kids places, Zoeys mom is my first cousin! We took Zoey with us last year to Monterey for 2 days so it's not a trust issue. :-)
Thanks for any and all input guys! I think I might look into buying a little camcorder (like pocket sized) so I can videotape everything BIG for them....IF David agrees, of course!

We have a nice big family across the street from us with 10 kids(5 hers, 4 his and 1 theirs) :eek: ...........My wife and I only have 1 child. There is no way they are taking those kids to Disneyland(they are worried more about basic things like health ins and food)

When we offered to take one with us a couple of years ago there was no hesitation in saying yes and thankyou :)
Every trip, we tend to take friends along. My son's senior year at high school, we took 5 of the senior varsity football players (there were only 7! and the entire team was only 16 player!) These kids were kids that otherwise would never have been able to go. I was in charge af 8 teens! OK, yes, I have no sanity left.

We have even taken my nephew when he was 18 mos, although his parents ended up joining us a couple days later cause they couldn't resist!

I would say no too. I understand how much fun it would be for my daughter to go, but it really is something that is very, very special to our family to do together for the first time. And we would have gone already, but things keep popping up. Not everyone's lives may be convienent as yours for them to be able to make the trip. For example: We booked a trip for April 2005, but hubby's hours changed so we had to postpone until Oct 2005. Then we found out I was pregnant and I dont want to go if I am 7 mos preggers and cant ride the mountains. Sooo we postponed until March 2006. Oops.. Hubby doesnt want to go with a baby that isnt old enough to smile and giggle and blabber on to entertain him while he waits for me and DD to ride certain rides....so now the date is set for Oct 06. See? Things pop up.

My question is, would you let YOUR kid go with someone else for their first trip to DL?

Nope. No Way. Na-Uh.

Adrienne

Also I wanted to add that to some parents, Disneyland is not that big of a deal to them. Some people don't dig the place and would happy to let someone else take their children. Sad, but true.

True but I think all kids should like that place. I hope when I have kids they like this place as much as I do

I would say no.

However, I don't remember my first trip to DL. I know that during the 70's and early 80's, we are talking up the age of 20, I went several times with my aunt and brother and I don't even remember whether or not my mom came with us. I know my mom did during the 80's trips but I would have been a teenager by then. I know that my dad missed several trips to Disneyland with us.

Personally, as a parent of an almost 2 year old, No...I would not let someone else take my child to Disneyland without me for his early visits to Disneyland. I think it's important for the family to take trips together and I would want to be there with my son. At 21 1/2 months he is so much fun to watch run around the parks and enjoy the rides. He loves the characters too.

Maybe the parents can't afford a trip to DL or WDW yet. Maybe they don't have that much free time to take a vacation that far away from home. People view things differently. For some people, like yourself, it might not be a big deal if someone else were to take your children to the park for their first visit. For others, as your friend, as some others have posted; it is a big deal for them to want to be with their children when they first visit Disneyland or WDW.

I am also of the thought that Disney should be a family experience. When I go, I want to spend time with my kids and create those memories. (Lots of pics and video!)

Can someone elaborate on some of the reasons why a child's friend should be / is brought along as a "playmate?" I respectfully ask because I am puzzled on the concept.

I bring one of my older girl's playmates with us lots of places. The museum, the beach, the water park and she similiarly goes with her friends and their families as well. (Not overnight stuff, yet, she's only 6, but lots of day trips) Why? Lots of reasons. For one, having a "third wheel" really eliminates sibling fights, especially in the car. She has more fun and behaves better. She and her friends learn how to behave when a guest of another family.

I had no friends as a child. We lived in a neighborhood with few children, I went to a private school apart from the few kids we did have in the neighborhood. My parents made no effort to encourage me in friendships, no play dates, no girl scouts, nothing that would allow me to socialize outside of school. I was a lonely child who grew up into an adult who had a hard time making friends. I am delighted at the strong social network my daughter has already formed and do everything I can to encourage it.

"Can someone elaborate on some of the reasons why a child's friend should be / is brought along as a "playmate?" I respectfully ask because I am puzzled on the concept."

Huh? Why wouldn't you bring someone along as a playmate? Especially when that someone may not be able to go for years to come. Zoey is a great kid, my cousins daughter, she gets along fabulously with my daughters, what's the big deal? Are you saying ONLY family should be brought on trips to Disneyland? Cos she IS family, she is my cousins daughter. I don't get it. I am an only child and through my entire childhood, we took a friend or two along with us on all of our many trips and I went on several trips with friends'. Or I stayed at a friends house when my parents went to the REALLY boring places <racing-'nuff said, ;) > What puzzles you? I would love to understand. :)

I am also of the thought that Disney should be a family experience. When I go, I want to spend time with my kids and create those memories. (Lots of pics and video!)

Can someone elaborate on some of the reasons why a child's friend should be / is brought along as a "playmate?" I respectfully ask because I am puzzled on the concept.My kids have always gone with friends to places like Six Flags and Great America. I have no desire to go there. There are other parents who feel that way towards Disneyland.

Why would I bring a child's friend along? Because both my child and the other child would enjoy it. It has helped teach my child how to be a good host(ess). They learn some people have different ways of doing things. One young man we have brought with us as a "playmate" for my son doesn't have a stable homelife, and we work at providing him a view of a normal family. My children enjoy being with their friends.

My kids are teens. I don't remember the last trip when we didn't have friends with us on a trip. It is really a lot of fun.

I think s/he wants to know why you feel you need to bring some one else on a family trip. Do you think your daughter would not have as much fun w/o one? If your child were a teenager I might understand the need for someone to go off with.

Do you like going with your husband/wife/girlfriend or boyfriend? You know, someone your own age? Kids and teens want that too. They have their own language like adults do. I still go with my daughter alone and with her friends/ cousins. You can do both. Disneyland is not just for family, imho. Do you want to raise people that think they can only experience certain things with just mom and dad? How will they ever go to college, get married?? My daughter has a friend who's parents share this feeling and they are anti-socialist to me (and everyone that knows them). It's weird.

Can someone elaborate on some of the reasons why a child's friend should be / is brought along as a "playmate?" I respectfully ask because I am puzzled on the concept.
Because it can be really fun! As a teenager I went to DL a few times with my bf's family and it was soo great!
Even tho DH and I want our daughters' first few experiences with DL to be with us, we have no problems of having a guest or letting her go with a family we know really well when she is much older. Kids do eventually grow up and sometimes want to share those happy moments with their friends as well as with their family.

Whew, thank goodness there is at least one or two people who agree that it's ok to bring a friend to Disneyland, I thought I had gone bonkers for a moment! Let me give some background why I think taking a friend for my daughter is a good idea:
Delaneys trips to DL:
First trip, 3 years old-everyone went. Me, DH, Del, my parents, DH's parents, DH's brother and sister, brothers girlfriend, friend of the family, etc. Del had a pretty ok time but was afraid of EVERYTHING.
Second trip, me and my mom take her. Goes fairly well, but Del just doesn't seem to have as much fun running around playing until <lightbulb> some other kids came along (talking about that water area in DCA). And yes, my mom and I were running around with no regard to our ages.... :D
Third trip, me and DH take Del. Del accuses us of only doing the things we want to do (yeah yeah, we DID use the baby swap for Screamin' and DH went on Indy once) but everything else was for her. We went to DCA to get a bite to eat and another girl exactly her age was sitting next to us, next thing we know, these 2 are best friends/soul mates (HAHAHA!) and dancing away to some boogie-woogie for over 30 minutes. Del was transformed into a completely different kid. All night long, she talked about her "friend" and maybe they would run into us again and I wonder where she is right now during this parade and on and on and on.
This year, I think she is ready. Zoey is ready and willing, so is her mom. If Zoeys mom feels ok "talking her husband into" letting Zoey come, that is their business. I feel lucky cos this year Del and I are getting APs and I foresee LOTS of trips!! In fact, a week after the family trip I will be coming by myself with my 2 yr. old and a week after that I will be going with one of my very good friends who is <shocker> closer to my age and I think it will be AMAZING to experience DL for the VERY FIRST TIME as only an adult can/will. Then in January or February, take Del again, just the 2 of us.
I hope this sheds light on the fact that I am not being a selfish bu++, wanting to deprive someone of not being there for their kids first trip. Just offering the opportunity....
.........Flame on.............

Do you like going with your husband/wife/girlfriend or boyfriend? You know, someone your own age? Kids and teens want that too. They have their own language like adults do. I still go with my daughter alone and with her friends/ cousins. You can do both. Disneyland is not just for family, imho. Do you want to raise people that think they can only experience certain things with just mom and dad? How will they ever go to college, get married?? My daughter has a friend who's parents share this feeling and they are anti-socialist to me (and everyone that knows them). It's weird.Its also nice to teach skills. My younger daughter brought a friend this last trip, her first. She learned it was not as easy as it looks. There was more negotiating, making sure her guest was happy, and doing things she might not normally do. My older daughter learned this bringing her best friend a few years back. It was an excellent experience for both of them. Its also nice when they go with others. They learn to be a guest, they get to experience things outside the family. I will say when we take a guest, I do brief the guest on what our family is like, what to expect, and what I expect (this is more important with teens.)