My wife and I are planning a quick trip from Connecticut to WDW for October 30-November 2. We will be taking my 12 year old daughter and 5 year old son. We will be leaving a 1 year old son and a 17 year old son with family for the three days.

We are torn whether or not to bring our three-and-a-half year old son with us or leave him with the 1 and 17 year olds.

Pros for bringing him with:
1) he's well behaved,
2) he's sweet and sensitive,
3) he is toilet trained,
4) he loves Mickey Mouse,
5) his is affected by his 5 year old brother' bragging,
6) there will be photographs of a trip to Disney (that he was not in) for him to see when he's older.

Cons about bringing him with:
1) he needs a three hour nap daily - thus a large chunk of our very short time will be spent on naps,
2) he is well under 40 inches - thus will not be allowed on many rides and we will end up splitting up the group and do less,
3) he will need a stroller,
4) sleeping arrangements will be difficult (Disney hotels are designed for families of four or less),
5) there will be some added airfare/food/ticket expense (this is secondary),
6) he likes his routine - a Disney adventure is outside his routine,
7) if he went he would probably not remember a thing about the trip because of his young age.
8) he is terrified of going into dark places (outside of sleeping) and doesn't like anything more thrilling than, for example, Dumbo.

I place a lot of weight on pros 1,4 and 6 as well as cons 1, 2, 7 and 8.
There may be other pros/cons as well, and if you have any I'd like to hear it.

We decided not to bring the 1 year old because only pro#2 and pro#6 apply and all of the cons are even more true. The 17 year old son is not going because he went during spring break to WDW with a friend's family this year. Also, we are planning for a major 10 day long whole-family trip to WDW in 2006.

Anyone have a similar experience? Anyone care to comment or make suggestions? Any strategies?

Pro: Children 3 and under are free
My friend took her 3 year old and she still talks about the trip.

Cons: My first trip was when I was 7 and all I remember is some kid jumping in the picture with my sister and me and Mickey Mouse.

It seems to me that the cons outweigh the pros (especially 2 and 8). I think maybe you should leave him home this time around (I agree he won't remember going).
His not being able to go on many of the rides at this point will impact the trip for you as well as your other children and naptimes will cut into your short trip. I think he'll get more out of the trip when you all go together in 2006 -- then your 1-year-old will be three, but you'll have more time and it won't be as much of a problem..

Bring home some fab gifts and let him help in the planning next time around.

I've had a similar experience with my own family back in 2002, when my sons were 7 and 2.

We all had fun, but yes we did have to stop earlier than we had wanted to almost every night (the little guy could sleep in the stroller for only so long before he got fussy).Not to mention the naps, etc that come with a little one...at times my 7 yr old was getting a little annoyed because he felt we had to cater our trip around the 2 yr old (which we kind of did). We went on the rides the 7 yr old wanted to, as long as the little guy was alright. Then there's the question of who goes on the ride with the oldest son, and who has to stay behind and babysit.

I know you said your 3 yr old loves Mickey, but I doubt he will be angry in later years when he sees the pictures of the trip. I question whether he'd even remember going if he did.

I'd buy him a Pal Mickey. That would relieve you of some of the guilt; I'm sure your son would love it, and when he gets older, explain to him that the reason he now has his valueble, collectable Pal Mickey is that it was bought as a special gift just for him because he was still a little too young to go with the other older children.

Just one man's thought...........................Wingnut :D

DizMagic, Three year olds are not free, just under 3. You have to pay for a child's ticket which is for 3-9 year olds.

We've been taking our 3 yr old since she was 18 mo. and she still remembers things about her first trip. Our last trip was this past Dec and she was 2. She remembers everything, and is constantly asking to go back. I think that if you are not planning on going back for a while, you may want to take him. If you are planning on returning in the next 2-3 years than it is pretty much a judgement call.

Cons about bringing him with:
1) he needs a three hour nap daily - thus a large chunk of our very short time will be spent on naps,
2) he is well under 40 inches - thus will not be allowed on many rides and we will end up splitting up the group and do less,
7) if he went he would probably not remember a thing about the trip because of his young age.
8) he is terrified of going into dark places (outside of sleeping) and doesn't like anything more thrilling than, for example, Dumbo. Since these are your main concerns, I'll address them specifically with suggestions or my own experience and let you be the judge.

1) One of you can go back to the hotel for naptime while the rest of the group keeps playing. You can meet again later after the nap. Cell phones are great.

2) "Baby swap" lets everyone in the group ride the rides "Jr" is too short for. One person sits out with the child while everyone else waits in line. When the group returns the person who waited (and one additional person) can ride without waiting in line (or have a very minimal wait time). Some people think just sitting in the exit is boring, but the Disney theming is usually enough to keep a 3-year-old entertained or you could even walk around and look in shops or ride some attractions the 3-year-old wants to ride that nobody else wants to. Cell phones are great. ;)

(Hint: Combine Fast Pass with Baby Swap for even shorter wait times. The group that has to "wait in line" can just use a Fast Pass. For a group of 4 plus one child, you can hold twice as many Fast Passes...2 of you don't need the Fast Pass.)

7) I don't put much importance with whether or not they'll remember the trip. The important thing is that it's a good family bonding experience where they get to spend time with you and the other siblings. He may not remember it, but you and the rest of the family will and you'll look at the pictures with him in them and have fond memories of the occasion. And you never can tell what a child will or won't remember. I'm surprised that my kids remember things that I thought they were too young to really remember.

I've noticed that my kids seem to have something triggered once they are potty trained. It's like a switch got flipped in their memory opening up memory retention/recollection banks that were previously unavailable. (I'm not a child psychologist, it's just something I've noticed. It could be age related or potty training related, but both seem to happen right around the same time. So far it's been 2 for 3. The third isn't potty trained yet.)

8) There's so much to do and see that doesn't involve getting in a ride vehicle and entering dark rooms that, if you use the opportunities around you, there will be plenty to spark his (and your) imagination. Also, how is one ever going to overcome their fears without ever confronting them. I'm not saying you should force him to ride something he doesn't, but it can be beneficial to give him the opportunity. He might surprise you. I've been surprised on several occasions when my kids have actually tried something they didn't like or were afraid of (with some "coercion" - okay, bribes - but never forced ;) ). Sometimes they ended up liking it, sometimes their opinions didn't change, but at least they gave it a shot and learned something.

If it were me, I'd base my decision on if I thought the family would be able to go back to Disney in the future.

We have six kids..16, 12, 5, 4, and 3 year old twins...and we just went to WDW last month. It was extremely important to me that we take a vacation as a family, so there was never a doubt in my mind about taking all of the kids. Then again, since our vacations are normally used to visit family 1000 miles away, I didn't know when we'd get another opportunity to go.

We were able to do everything that we wanted to do when we were there. We did have to split up to do some things, but most of the time we were all together and had a great time.

I'm sure I've read that at least one or two of the Disney resorts can accommodate up to 5 people, but I'm not sure which ones.

I agree with wingnut. I think you are more worried about the guilt but bring him back some great gifts and he'll be fine. We did a trip to Scotland in 1999 - my 2 DD's and myself and my son stayed home with his dad. He has never looked at the pictures and been upset about it and now he gets to go on trips they don't because they have to work. I would make it perfectly clear to the 5 year old though - NO bragging. Think about the rest of the family - this is such a short trip and you will have to cater to the 3 year old - it's just the way it is. You are going back in 2006 for a long vacation so you have lots of time to work around the little ones. I would make this short trip commando style with the older kids with the knowledge that next time you will have to plan differently for the little ones.

2) he is well under 40 inches - thus will not be allowed on many rides and we will end up splitting up the group and do less,
3) he will need a stroller,

I place a lot of weight on pros 1,4 and 6 as well as cons 1, 2, 7 and 8.
There may be other pros/cons as well, and if you have any I'd like to hear it.

Anyone have a similar experience? Anyone care to comment or make suggestions? Any strategies?

Well, doing the kid swap as someone else suggested is THE way to go. We had a five year old that we were told "will do anything". Right. She didn't like the dark, she didn't like loud noises. We were kind of overwhelmed but once we did the kid swap, everyone was happy. Fit it into your plans. The time I spent with my granddaughter at the Rose Garden in Magic Kingdom while everyone else was doing Space Mountain cannot ever be duplicated. Sure, I could have ridden afterwards with someone else but why bother? She and I had such fun doing something her parents will never do. And the look on her face when we did Triceratops Spoin and everyone else was doing Primeval While? Again, priceless.

I thought a stroller would be a pain. The five year old was just a bit big for it but we took it everywhere "just in case". We used it about 25% of the time. It was never a hassle, never a problem. We bought an umbrella stroller for $20 at Toys R Us before we left and it was the best investment we've ever made. It folded up quickly, was easy to push (with and without the youngster) and we never worried about it.

And as for him remembering things, you never know what kids remember. I can recall something that happened to me when I was two. And that was some time ago. But I still remember it vividly. I can't remember everything that happened when I was two but I can't remember everything that happened to me last year. Take your son, maybe leave the one year old and tell the 17 year old that even though he's been there, done that, and is going back, he'll still have fun.

We have four children, and have been taking them all since they were infants. In my eyes, it is just a different Disney experience, not a worse or better one. One of my very favorite pictures of WDW is my 2 year old daughter sitting on a sidewalk near Journey to Imagination, watching a little parade of tree frogs tumble on by her! It was pure magic, and I would not have missed it for the world! Little ones do require different schedules, but there are two adults in this group, and I guess you need to decide whaat kind of visit you have. For me, Disney IS family, and to not take one of my children would mean a little piece of my heart was back at home..That's just me as a mom, though!
Whatever you do, feel peaceful with it. If it bothers you on some level, it is probably not the right decision.
Take care!

I'm with ccola67: are you ever planning to go back?
IMO, 3 is too young for a long trip to WDW. Heck, the 5yo is about on the bubble.

I'm with ccola67: are you ever planning to go back?
IMO, 3 is too young for a long trip to WDW. Heck, the 5yo is about on the bubble.
Our 5.5YO has been to WDW 5 times (at 1, 1.5, 4, 4.5, and 5) and DLR once (at 2.5). Some of the photos from his first trip are priceless. He still remembers things from the DLR trip. He can't wait to go back.

What age is right depends on the child, and upon how much you are willing to modify your park plans to include him. If you're going to be resentful about changing your plans to accommodate him, then nobody's going to have fun. If you're going to take it in stride, sometimes the youngest ones provide the most delightful moments.

My husband and I have been takingour 4 year old daughter to Disneyland since she was 2. When she was an infant, we left her with our parents. On our last trip, she was 3, and she talks about it all the time! She's very excited for our upcoming trip in September... (We'll be leaving our 10 month old daughter at home)

There are moments I wouldn't trade for anything in the world, like watching my daughter walk up to Mickey Mouse last year like she was in a trance... Sure, it's different from going with a group of people old enough to go on all the rides, but it's a completely different, and still wonderful experience.

And even if he's not old enough to remember it as more than a blur when he's older, it will definetly be commited to his short term memory, and your long term. :)

Good luck with your decision!

My 4 yo has been to WDW 3 times (at 2.5, 3 &4). She has been to DL 1 time. She remembers all of these trips and will say things like, "remember when I was scared of Chip and Dale?" or "no Mommy, that happened at DL, not WDW."

For us, we found at WDW that by 3, she would just doze a bit in the stroller (even though at home she still took 2-3 hour naps) and then would konk out right after dinner and sleep for 12-13 hours until the next morning.

I'm not saying you should necessarily take your 3.5 yo. But I am pointing out that they remember a lot more than we give them credit for and are able to adjust their schedules somewhat so that the family can be accommodated more easily. (and really, at the end of the day I think your 5 yo is going to be just as tired as the 3.5 yo would be).

I think the deciding factor would be that, if you bring him along, your entire trip will center around his schedule (which is as it should be). If you're willing to make those sacrifices, then go for it. But I've seen too many families at Disney parks with kids that're WAY too young to be there. The kid isn't happy, the family isn't happy, and the people around them who have to endure their situation aren't happy. It just doesn't seem worth it to me.

Good luck with your decision!

My husband and I just took our son to WDW for the first time in Jan/Feb. We also took my 20 year old sister with us. We left our 2 year old home. Well guess what, we ended up feeling guilty knowing how much fun she would have had. Therefore, the day after we got home, we booked a second trip to go back this year for Halloween Weekend. Yes, we are going to have shorter days and more time by the pool and so on, but isn't that what a vacation is all about? So, we are going to go back and spend most of our time at Animal Kingdom and, mostly, at Magic Kingdom. We will hop on over to MGM and Epcot for a short bit but we are just going to have fun and do the things she and my son will like such as the Princess Breakfast at Akershus where she can meet Belle, Sleeping Beauty, and the gang- MNSSHP on Halloween itself! We regretted not having her with us and are making sure to go back just to take her. She looks at our pictures now and can name all of the characters without assistance...that was when we realized she would have loved being there! When without being provoked she said "Mickey!", "Belle!", and "Cin-rella", we knew we would be dropping a small fortune again to go back in October.

So, basically, my opinion is....TAKE HIM! ;)

Adding on, we figured we would do a shorter trip now and then in 4 years or so, do the longer 10-14 day trip we really want to do- then she will be nearly 7 and my son 12 but they will both have a good ole' time!

Our 5.5YO has been to WDW 5 times (at 1, 1.5, 4, 4.5, and 5) and DLR once (at 2.5). Some of the photos from his first trip are priceless. He still remembers things from the DLR trip. He can't wait to go back.

What age is right depends on the child, and upon how much you are willing to modify your park plans to include him. If you're going to be resentful about changing your plans to accommodate him, then nobody's going to have fun. If you're going to take it in stride, sometimes the youngest ones provide the most delightful moments.

I think your situation is different, since you will be going quite often, and you won't miss something and regret it.
We took our 6-yo. (And a CM relative.) Worked great for us, since it hardly cost anything. He did get sick one day and had to go back to the hotel with mommy, but my other son and I stuck it out at the parks.

Hmm, let me rethink my position: 3yo gets in free.... take him!
If not, then don't!

We took our son for the first time when he was three. He is our only child. He was good about taking naps in the stroller, so, we used nap time to do things that were more attractive to adults, like walk around world showcase at Epcot or shopping at downtown Disney. He still remembers and talks about his first trip. I guess he was unusually tall for his age--he was 42" when we went in fall 2001, which was tall enough for Kali Rapids, which was a big mistake. He hasn't wanted to try that ride again since. (Now he is 6).

I guess he was unusually tall for his age--he was 42" when we went in fall 2001, which was tall enough for Kali Rapids, which was a big mistake. He hasn't wanted to try that ride again since. (Now he is 6).

LOL, you have to be careful about that! I may never get my daughter back on Snow White's Scary Adventures again! :rolleyes:

Take them all! ;) I agree that it will be a different trip than if you did not take him, but different can be good. I have 4 dc 7, 4, 2 and 8 mos. Our usual game plan is to rent a hotel room. We get up early and eat breakfast (hopefully continental) and go into DL. Let each child ride I-have-to-ride-this rides then hit any others we might like. We take the monorail to Rainforest Cafe. Keeps kids busy while providing good, inexpensive grown up foods. Then we go back to the hotel for naps. After a couple of hours we hit the park again. This is when we usually switch off between grown up and kid rides. For example: My oldest wants to ride Indy so I will take her while DH takes the rest on Jungle Cruise and Tarzan then we meet back up for a snack at the closest place. Then we will go to another ride that the kids want like Storybook Land Boats. Then we might catch a Parade and hit any missed rides.

My main game plan at this time in our lives is to make sure everyone gets to ride at least 2 rides they want and to have a good family time. No, we won't get to see everything in the park. But that will give us something to look forward to on our next trip.

As long as you can return for another trip when your little ones are older, I'd take just the 12 and 5 year olds. Expenses will be far less than bringing the whole family, and with only a few days you'll already be dividing your time between the interests of a 12 year old and a 5 year old. I think 5 is a great age to first experience the parks, old enough to be past naps and many fears, but young enough to really buy into the magic. Make this a special time for these kids and have fun with the younger ones on a special trip for them later.

I think 5 is a great age to first experience the parks, old enough to be past naps...

Hey, I'm 47 and I'm not old enough to be past naps!!!

I think one very important question that should be considered is how the 3-year-old is likely to react when you return from the trip and the older siblings start discussing all the fun they had on the trip. It really seems to me that could generate at least a certain sense of favoritism among the siblings. To be honest, I'm not convinced you won't even have the same problem with the 1-year-old.

Obviously, everyone has to make whatever decisions are right for their own family, but personally I simply can't fathom the idea of taking only some young children and not the others on a family vacation, whether it is to a Disney park or anywhere else. Admittedly, I don't have experience with really large families (I only have one child now and grew up with only one sibling), but it seems to me that family vacations should be primarily about togetherness for the entire family.

At the risk of sounding a bit harsh, my thought is that if the costs/logistics of taking all of your kids to WDW are prohibitive, perhaps it would be wiser to consider finding another vacation destination that is a better fit for your family.

-Jeff

I've always been a big proponent of not taking little kids (say younger than 5) to the parks. I'm frequently overridden on this, but there is just so much work involved in taking a really young child who would be just as amused by the decorations at the local mall. But I could see how it would be tough if your younguns are spread out somewhat. How do you tell your 12 year old that he can't go to Disneyland till his 3 year old brother grows up a bit more? It's a tough problem that, fortunately, I don't have to face (yet!).

Take him!!! A couple of years ago I had meningitis and nearly died. It really shook me up and nowadays I have (albeit unhealthy sometimes) fear. I think of not allowing my children to do something and then (God forbid) if anything was to happen to either myself or them, how would I feel? I know this is pretty pesimistic, but how would you feel if you didn't take the little one and then because of changes in circumstances, not be able to take him again???? I try and do everything I can to include my children (somethings which would most definately be easier without them) because none of us know whats around the corner.
You never know, the pure delight the 3 yr old would bring to your holiday, and the look on his face must be worth something.