Hubby is making me insane, HELP

[Leslie]

Well, I have had this trip with hubby planned for many months now. To take plane from our home town to Orlando then stay at the Pop to save money for 7 days and get park hoppers. Bring non regrigerated foods and get cold foods only from Garden Grocer to put in our FREE frig. and eat 2 meals in the room. NOW hubby is on this "I dont think we can afford to go to Disney" and if so what can you do to bring down the price? I said what:eek:??? He said please try to reduce the cost I should of known he would do this as he is such a tight wad. So this is what I have done this far tell me what else I can do. Now drive 4 hours to Detroit to save 450.00 on plane tickets, cancell 1 room and cram into 1 room at $55.00 a night (disney mailer) skip the park hopper and do the regular passes to save $100.00 and since eating 2 meals in room then eat dinner at counter service. I have taken 1 day off our trip to save on room and dinner cost. The total cost for everything for 6 days, plane, room and tickets for 2 adults = $1300.00.....can anyone else think of anything I can do to bring down costs for Nov.29th-Dec.5th.... Wait until he hears we have luggage to pay for. That wont go over well. I stress over each vacation we take because of his money tight ways. Any tips would be greatly appreaciated...

[JennyWren]

I wish I could think of something...I think you are doing quite well. Really $1300 for hotel, airfare and tickets is really reasonable I think.

Hang in there, I'm rooting for ya. Best wishes,

[anniedg]

Wow, Leslie, kudos for keeping it at $1300!
I'm not really any help except you could try your best to just bring carry-ons, no luggage costs then. There are sites that give lots of tips on packing light.
Good luck, it's no fun to have to stress so much over something that you'd like to be joyful.

[mom22gls]

You have done an amazing job planning an affordable vacation. As nervous as my husband is about spending money on vacations, he also likes to enjoy himself. I would let him know that there are some down sides to all the economizing. If you only take carry on bags, then you can't bring many clothes, and that means you have to do laundry, which will take time out of the day. I absolutely hate to do laundry on vacation, and I would let him know that he should do it. Do you go out to eat at home? I think it would be reasonable to have one or two nice dinners out-suggest to him that maybe you can make a reservation at one of the nicer restaurants-just for an appetizer and dessert, or share an entree. Wanna bet, when you are there, he decides to order soup to nuts? I think you are doing the right thing by cutting down on the up-front expenses. Say nothing, don't complain, but when you are there, it is likely that he will loosen up, a little.

[Drince88]

I really would look at the cost of ordering non-refrigerated stuff from Garden Grocer vs checking a bag (and buying it at home, don't forget that in the cost comparison!). Since you're already buying the cold stuff from them, you don't have to include the delivery charge. You can also order liquid items from them (toothpaste, shampoo, sunscreen, etc) so you don't have to worry about the "3 oz containers in a quart bag" TSA rule.

When you said free refrigerator, I'm assuming you have medicine that needs to be kept refrigerated (or else there is a charge at Pop for this). One time they gave me an accessible room and the refrigerator seemed smaller than the ones at the moderates that I was used to. So they wouldn't give you a free 'normal size' refrigerator in that case.

I don't know if I'd characterize two adults as having to cram into one room at Pop Century. They're not suites, but they're not THAT small!

Personally, if I was stressing over money and looking at eating 2 meals in my hotel room each day of a vacation, I'd really consider postponing and saving the money for a later trip that could be a little more relaxing.

[Leslie]

Going at a later date wont happen because of hubbys work schedule. This will be it for a very long time and I dont think we will never get the $55.00/ night disney room specials again. Hubby has a medical condition that requires cold meds. so we will save on the frig. there. The plane fare for Airtran non-stop from DTW to MCO is 239.00 pp. Is that good? I dont know a good price from a bad price. I told hubby I would carry snack bars to snack on while in the parks but I better not hear I want a turkey leg or ice cream. In which I will remind him of his tight ways and why he CANT have one. lol Garden Grocer is a must and I will have to do laundry so I will being the Purell all in one fabric sheets. I know I can pull this off. I need to be really careful and keep track of all my expenses. Eating out just will not be in the cards this time but I dont visit to eat I cant wait to do all the attractions and walk around. I can eat p and j sandwiches until the end of time. I scrapped the bottle water idea and hope the resorts tastes good and we dont get sick.

[mom22gls]

Unless there is a real, and objective reason to conserve money at this time-as in one of you gets laid off or something like that, don't cancel. I think you have a great attitude, and you will have a great time. I agree about increasing your Garden Grocer order-you can order a lot of items, for the same delivery charge. If you are trying to keep your luggage to carry ons, you won't be able to pack much more than clothing. I would order sunscreen, and that sort of thing from Garden Grocer, and pick up a few travel-size toiletries. If you can, quietly, conserve a little cash prior to the trip, I would, as in pack lunches from home, instead of buying fast food, for a few weeks before your trip. Plan a little time to yourself, and plan one special thing that you can do, to make it feel like you are away from home. There are lots of things you can do that would not cost much money. For example, how about afternoon tea at the Grand Floridian. It's a lovely hotel, and it feels so special to be served tea, maybe a cocktail, and little sandwiches and desserts. I've gone with my family, but I would, totally, do it by myself, and love every second. You would probably need a reservation, but it's a great break from the parks, for an hour or so. Or have one drink at a lounge in a Deluxe resort-how about the Animal Kingdom Lodge-walking around the cool lobby, and watching the animals is free-suggested viewing spots-the bridge that goes over the lobby, and the observation area near the pools.

[Leslie]

Yup, Im going to get real creative on this one. And I bet he wont even notice what I have done or scaraficed to make him happy and less grouchy..I'll have to sneak the mousekeeping tip envelope after he walks out the door. I will leave the room last. lol I'll beat him at this his tightness game if it's the last thing I do. Watch that would mean I have to go myself. I better be careful. lol

[momof three]

Are your dates and airport flexible at all? There is a no frill airline called Allegiant Air that flies out of Grand Rapids, MI into Sanford airport in Orlando. There are some huge down sides to this. You would have to rent a car. With this airline you pay extra if you want an assigned seat, to board early, to check a bag is additional $30.00 basically you pay for any and all extra connivances. They don’t fly everyday and they only fly once on the days they fly. I have flown them twice before. I did carry on luggage only. I had to get to Michigan last minute and money was tight. It’s a big time no frill but it beats driving.

I looked and if you changed your dates to 12/3- 12/10 they have seats at $69.00 each way. Total for two with taxes and fees was $341.00. You can add a compact rental car through Alamo on their site for $182.00. The total package price would be $523.40. That would give you a car the whole stay. This would allow you to shop off site for your extra groceries and toiletries instead of garden grocer. Eating out off site is far cheaper. If you can snag the rate you currently have at Pop I wouldn’t which resorts. I doubt you could find anything off site that is as nice for that price and once you factor in the free parking at the parks by staying on site you will be way ahead.

Another thought would be to leave the Disney Downer guy at home. That saves you the price of one plane ticket and perhaps some sanity. lol. I sympathies with you my hubby use to always grumble about vacation planning. All he cared about was the cost. It wasn’t that we couldn’t afford it. He just didn’t want to be bothered with it. I finally took our boys who were three and four at the time and went on a vacation alone one year. That lit a fire under him. Now a family vacation is in the budget every year. Sometimes it’s a local camping trip but we do a family vacation every year now. Good luck to you.

Mily

[scoobydooby]

Leslie - the water in the water parks fountains is vile but the water in the drinks dispensers at the food courts is free and good. Buy 4 bottles then re-fill from the food court and put in your fridge over night. I would not be put off going because of a lack of TS meals personally. Sure we enjoy them but we would enjoy Disney parks themselves just as much without the food thing. I think you've done a great job. Can you make any money in advance recycling? We can't here in the UK but check out Mrs. Grumpy's pre-trip report. She's saved a huge amount!

By the way - had you really booked 2 rooms just for the 2 of you? I'm sure you'll be more than fine in 1, after all,you are going togetehr aren't you ? ;)

[bennette]

If we left it up to my husband we would never go anywhere. Fortunately he has accepted this over time and lets me initiate planning for trips. He still is a little bit grumpy about it but he gets on board. Until he did, I vacationed solo quite a bit.

Not wanting to step into anyone's marriage but you have done a ton of planning on this (I've watched) and he probably has no idea of what you've done to save money. I can't can't see what the impetus for your not being able to afford it? If it's just because he's a tightwad and you can afford a reasonably priced trip, well, hey, YOU deserve one. If you have true economic issues, maybe postponing to a more conducive time would be best. I'm sure you know best which of these is the right option.

When my husband gets wherever we're going, and relaxes, his tightwad ways diminish and he eventually decides he loves our trips He really got on board for Orlando because we went through Disney for room and dining and had everything paid off in advance and all spending money saved on on pre-paid Visa debit cards or American Express gift cards.

That won't work for your trip exactly, I just wanted you to know that sometimes the magic does start when you get there, even for grumpy travelers.

Good luck!

[mom22gls]

When I was first married, we could not afford any big vacations for the first few years. When we finally could consider a more expensive trip, I asked my husband what he thought we could spend. He threw out a number, and I did some research, and told him what we could get for that amount. He expressed an interest in Bermuda, and, managed to come up with the money to go where he wanted to go. We went to Bermuda. After that, his idea of a perfect vacation was always a little more upscale than what I would settle for, but if he wanted to do it, the money always materialized, somehow. Now I have a list of places he has to decide it's his idea to go.

[Leslie]

Yes, Scoobydoo I did book 2 connecting rooms because hubby breaths and snores so bad at night he can wake the dead and we havent shared a bedroom in years plus his breathing machine humms, whistles and I swear bounches around on the night stand. But to make him money happy (sort of) I decided to suck it up and put up with him for a week even though I wont sleep for a week. See Im trying to work with him here and all he is doing is complaining about the cost of EVERYTHING....Not a done deal yet Im still on it. I bet I will sleep on the chairs at the pool at night until they start to power wash. lol

[Leslie]

His money tightness comes from his up bringing they NEVER left the state and scrapped for everything. BUT we more then have enough money for this trip he is just thinking what else could we do with 1300.00 other than a weeks trip that he will forget about in a few years. So it's not like the money isint there HE'S JUST A HUGE TIGHT WAD and the worse I have ever seen. He complained just the other day when the dogs food cost 7.99. I said it will last him a month at lease. See my dilema? It's just him being him...

[scoobydooby]

Yes, Scoobydoo I did book 2 connecting rooms because hubby breaths and snores so bad at night he can wake the dead and we havent shared a bedroom in years plus his breathing machine humms, whistles and I swear bounches around on the night stand. But to make him money happy (sort of) I decided to suck it up and put up with him for a week even though I wont sleep for a week. See Im trying to work with him here and all he is doing is complaining about the cost of EVERYTHING....Not a done deal yet Im still on it. I bet I will sleep on the chairs at the pool at night until they start to power wash. lol

Ok I'm sorry - tie him to a pool chair instead for the nights :D

Or save half the cost and go alone................

[Leslie]

Dont be sorry, HE will be the one sleeping on the pool chairs not me. Or put him out the room door on a rollaway. lol

[mom22gls]

It's not that unusual for someone to grow up not knowing how to take a vacation. I know a couple who have these issues. Once, the husband, who grew up in New Jersey, told me that his parents would load the kids up the in the car to go to the beach, then would drive around, stop at motels that had vacancies, then would go in and ask about a room. If they considered the room too expensive, they would turn around and go home. The kids, repeatedly, got their hopes up, and were disappointed. Back in the day (the man I am speaking of is my age), you had to pick up a phone to inquire about hotels, no internet. My mother had a well-worn AAA guide, and she would work the phones to plan our vacations. She would never dream of getting our hopes up, if my parents could not afford a vacation. We did a beach vacation most years; one year we skipped because they had to pave the long driveway, so there was no cash for the vacation, but we knew not to expect it, for a good reason. This guy still has a very hard time going on vacation, and his wife just plans everything, and sometimes she and their daughter go without him. I would tell him, once-this vacation is within our budget, and I won't discuss money on the vacation. You don't discuss it either-if he wants the turkey leg, he can have it; it may be a sign that he's ready to loosen up and enjoy himself. If you really do have the cash for it, adding the Dining plan may be a good idea-tell him it's all paid for, just enjoy your meal.

[Leslie]

LOL Oh my god if I added something to this trip instead of taking something away he would come un-glued. LOL The thing is, 5 years ago he couldnt get to the Virgin Islands fast enough and twice the cost because he could so called "relax" now that I want to come back to Disney and go go go it's a different story. I swear Im coming out on top this time and were both going and going to have a great time or he can just suck it up...LOL

[bennette]

He can suck it up. It's a big park and there's plenty for everyone to do.

My husband and I are very comfortable spending some time apart on vacation (it's usually way more together time that we get at home and it's easy to overload) and Disney is a great place for you to each find your own happy place.

I do really support this bit from mom22gals:


I would tell him, once-this vacation is within our budget, and I won't discuss money on the vacation. You don't discuss it either-if he wants the turkey leg, he can have it; it may be a sign that he's ready to loosen up and enjoy himself. If you really do have the cash for it, adding the Dining plan may be a good idea-tell him it's all paid for, just enjoy your meal.

And once you've told him, it's time for you to relax, too.

[mom22gls]

And don't forget, that your vacation costs are offset by cash you would be spending, if you were at home, doing your normal activities. If you weren't on vacation, you would be buying groceries to eat at home, for example, or one or both of you might have a normal hobby or social night, that is built into your budget. One or both of you would have normal commuting costs to go to work. In our case, if we travel during the summer, at a time we, usually would have the kids enrolled in day camp, because we would both be at work-what we don't spend, by not having them in camp that week offsets the cost of travel. If you figure that your dining budget on vacation is offset by whatever you would be spending on food at home (and that includes buying coffee, lunches, etc.), and your in-room dining is probably cheaper than what you usually eat at home, then you may find that you are not spending much more than you would to eat, anyway.

[TinaMouse]

Whoa, Leslie. I vote to leave him at home. :p You've worked really hard at this, and frankly, I wouldn't want to take a trip ANYWHERE where I had to eat PB&J twice a day. You are a better woman than I. I cannot think of one more thing you can do to make it cheaper. Seriously.

Will he be a party-pooper when you get there? If so, is it worth going? Not to be Debbie Downer here, but a grumpy spouse for 7 days can make for everyone being miserable. I guess what I'm asking is --If he is going to be really passive aggressive while you're there are you going to hate this vacation too?

Does he know how important this is to you? Have you sat him down and expressed why you want to do this? I'd just say, "This is really important to me and we do have the money for it. If you don't understand, that's ok, but can you give me a good reason why you can't support me in this?"

Tell him that "we" said that you've cut your budget between 1/3 and 1/2 of what we would spend for the same amount of time. That way, he'll know you're a miracle worker!

Good luck and hugs--

[tappenfeat]

Yes, Scoobydoo I did book 2 connecting rooms because hubby breaths and snores so bad at night he can wake the dead and we havent shared a bedroom in years plus his breathing machine humms, whistles and I swear bounches around on the night stand. But to make him money happy (sort of) I decided to suck it up and put up with him for a week even though I wont sleep for a week. See Im trying to work with him here and all he is doing is complaining about the cost of EVERYTHING....Not a done deal yet Im still on it. I bet I will sleep on the chairs at the pool at night until they start to power wash. lol

I have one of those too Leslie! The girls and I run when Daddy sleeps! :p Snoring has impacted a lot of couples so you are not alone. Do earplugs help?

Our last trip we stayed at AKL after staying at our Timeshare. We had more room in the Timeshare and he slept on the sleeper sofa in a separate room. At AKL I pulled the mattress off the bed and put it in the hallway by the door. Hey! We have to do what we have to do to sleep right? ;)

You did an excellent job of pinching your pennies...I'm sure once you get there all will be fine. Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.

[danyoung]

I have one suggestion that probably won't be very popular. Don't do the mousekeeping tips. Sure, they're nice, but they're not totally required like tipping a restaurant waitperson. Housekeepers will tell you that they receive tips in about half of the rooms. They won't short-sheet your bed or spread roaches in your bathroom. You'll still get the same quality cleaning, and save a few bucks as well.

[mom22gls]

You'd stiff the housekeeping staff, to save less than $20. Pul-leeze

[Leslie]

Nope not me, although I understand where Danyoung is coming from. I will just make another cut somewhere. Thanks for the tips...